Come As You Are
by 741N73D 4N63L
Summary: Episode 200 Tribute: "Catherine?" There is the distinct sound of barely restrained panic in Will's voice. "Will?" I mumble. He exhales loudly, "Catherine, have you heard from JJ?" I yawn widely, "No." My brain kicks in, "Why?" Will's voice cracks, "She hasn't come home."
1. Part 1

AN: Thank you to **AWChic** who suggested that I should do something with Emily, JJ, and Catherine for the 200th episode. I had a few other ideas that didn't fit into this story so I'm going to do a Take 2 sometime soon.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau is mine along with any other characters you don't recognize.

* * *

**PART 1**

* * *

Come as you are, as you were,

As I want you to be,

As a friend, as a friend,

As an old enemy

- Come As You Are, Nirvana

* * *

Tuesday February 4, 2014

8:00 pm

Spencer completely engrossed in a thick-stapled document comes to a stop inside of the elevator and makes a note in red.

JJ watches him with barely hidden amusement, "Hey Spence."

He looks up in surprise, "Oh. Hi JJ!"

"Something interesting in that?" She asks nodding to the papers.

Spencer grins at her, "It's the newest copy of Catherine's thesis."

JJ rolls her eyes, "How much too long is it this time?"

Spencer frowns, "I've been crossing out sections so only about ten pages too long. She doesn't know I have it… You won't tell her will you?"

JJ laughs at Spencer's worried look. "No, I won't tell her, but it's on your head if she finds out. How did you get it anyway?"

Spencer blushes, "Garcia copied it off Catherine's air server, because I couldn't find the copy she was planning to give to Blake."

JJ frowns, "You mean her cloud?"

He scrunches up his nose, "Yeah, that sounds right."

JJ steps out of the elevator.

Spencer follows her, "JJ?"

She sighs, "Yes Spencer?"

"Do you want to come over for dinner?" he blurts out.

JJ frowns, "Spence-"

He interrupts her, "Catherine has her late class tonight and then we were going to watch a film. You could come over and eat with us."

JJ sighs.

Spencer continues, "You could bring Will. Henry could sleep in the spare bedroom." He holds the doors open for JJ.

She nods her thanks and considers the situation before answering, "You haven't picked an English movie have you?"

"Well no," he mumbles, "But I know how to turn on the subtitles, or we could pick a different film."

JJ places her hand on Spencer's arm.

He stops walking and turns to face her.

JJ sighs, "I just want to go home Spence. I want to see my son and take a nice long bath."

Spencer frowns, "That was a no to movie night right?"

JJ smiles faintly, "Yes. Thank you for the offer, but I just want to go home. Give my love to Catherine. I'll call her before it gets too late."

JJ starts walking again.

Spencer's eyes follow her as she gets into her car and drives away.

* * *

9:57 pm

I drop my bag by the door when I get home and wander off in search of Spencer. When I find him, he has already got the sleeping bags, pillows, and popcorn set up in the living room. I don't bother to hide my smile. Spencer is too tall to lie down on our couch, so couch cushions wrapped in sleeping bags are definitely the way to go. I chuckle when I notice the TV is set up and the remote pointed at the DVD player, ready for Spencer to press play.

After a few properly worded arguments he learned how to use the DVD player. It is truly a good thing tonight since Spencer is the one who insisted on a movie, and I'm too tired to set everything up properly.

I walk up to Spencer, throw my arms around his waist, and rest my head on his chest.

He wraps his arms around me, and kisses the top of my head.

I lean into him and inhale; Spencer's scent always brings a silly smile to my lips.

"Long day?" he murmurs.

I yawn and nod, "Too long. I missed you. Did you make out okay?"

"I missed you too," Spencer answers. "Yeah, we caught the guy." He pauses, "I invited JJ over."

I tilt my head up and start to turn my head to look for my sister.

Spencer catches my eyes, "JJ said she was going home, that she'll call later, and that she sends her love."

I yawn, "Did Henry call to say good night?"

Spencer tucks my hair behind my ear, "Yes, he did, and he was sorry he missed you."

I nod, "Did-"

He cuts me off, "The message is on the answering machine. I didn't listen to it because Maura started off in a croaky voice with, 'Hi Spencer this message is for Catherine, not you'."

I laugh quietly, "Okay. I'll listen to it in the morning."

Once Maura realized that Spencer was the one checking the messages most nights she started a one sided conversation with him, but unlike myself, he's not allowed to call her back. Spencer has to wait until he answers the phone when she's calling. It's happened several times over the past year and a half, and Maura is continually amazed by Spencer's recollection of what she has previously said.

"Did you eat dinner?" Spencer asks, "If you didn't there is a plate in the fridge for you."

I stand on my tiptoes and kiss him gently, "Thank you Spence, but I already ate."

Spencer sits down on the couch. "Popcorn?" he asks, holding the bowl out to me.

I smile, sit down next to him and take the offered bowl.

Spencer presses play and I curl into him, popcorn forgotten in the face of what promises to be an interesting movie. They always are when Spence has the chance to pick.

A few seconds later, I roll my eyes when I realize that Spencer picked a Russian film. It's sweet and for a good reason; I'm supposed to be keeping my conversation skills current for the next time the Ambassador calls to check on my progress not just in Russian, but French and German as well. It is adorable that Spencer is trying to help, but I'm exhausted and he hasn't picked a single English film in weeks.

* * *

10:45 pm

Spencer pauses the movie.

I frown and turn to him, "Why did you do that?"

He raises an eyebrow, "So we can brush our teeth and find pyjamas. The movie is five hours long Catherine."

I groan, "Spencer it's a weeknight! I have to go in tomorrow. Why did you pick one that was so long?"

He frowns, "Because I haven't seen this one in a while and if you had come home early enough to eat dinner, we could have started watching while we ate."

I frown and stand up, "I can't make it home earlier Spencer. I take the bus to school now. My timing depends on their schedule, not my own."

Spencer crosses his arms; "I never get to spend time with you here."

"I'm not the one who's gone for several days in a row," I say as I walk out of the living room.

I take a few minutes to calm down as I put on my pyjamas, brush and plait my hair.

When I get back, Spencer is already lying down on top of the cushion stuffed sleeping bags with both of our phones within arm's reach.

"I'm sorry," we blurt out at the same time.

I smile and lie down on top of him.

He laughs and pulls the afghan off the coffee table, covering me with it.

I yawn and settle in for the rest of the movie.

* * *

11:30 pm

I'm half asleep, and only partially paying attention to the movie. _Why oh why is it five hours long?_ A phone rings; I ignore it. I'm perfectly content letting Spencer's heartbeat lull me to sleep right here on the living room floor.

Spencer kisses my head and whispers, "Catherine wake up, your phone is ringing."

"Mhmp," I moan and silently refuse to move.

He sighs, and answers my phone with a "Hello, Catherine Jareau's phone, this is Spencer Reid speaking. How might I direct your call."

I smile into Spencer's chest.

"Hi Will. Why are you not calling from your house or cellular phone? No- no she's not. She said she was going home." He pauses, "I don't think so." I can hear the frown in Spencer's voice. "It'll take a minute or two Will, she's practically asleep."

Spencer runs his hand up and down my back a few times. "Wake up sweetheart," he whispers, "Will needs to talk to you."

I grumble, "Mhmp."

"Catherine," Spencer's voice is sharper.

I frown and stick my hand out from under the afghan. I open and close my hand to get Spencer's attention.

He sighs and places my cell in my hand.

I hold it up to my ear. My hello comes out more like a grunt.

"Catherine?" Will asks.

"Mhm," I answer.

"Catherine?" There is the distinct sound of barely restrained panic in Will's voice.

"Will?" I mumble.

He exhales loudly, "Catherine, have you heard from JJ?"

I yawn widely, "No." My brain kicks in, "Why?"

Will's voice cracks, "She hasn't come home."

I frown, "Spencer talked to her before he came home and Jenny said she was going home."

I can hear the frown in his voice, "I've checked the entire house, and she's not here Catherine. Have you heard from her?"

"No, but give me minute and I'll check my phone." I look at the missed calls section and frown, "Jen didn't call Will but she told Spence she would."

I can hear Will moving around, "I'm calling Hotch next and if he doesn't have any answers I'm going to the BAU to get some."

I roll off Spencer and sit up.

He copies my motions.

I take a breath, "I'm coming with you. I'll-"

Will cuts me off, "No you're not. You're going to stay home until someone calls for you."

I growl, "Damn it Will! She's my sister!"

Will's voice is harsh, "She's my wife Catherine! And you know very well that Spencer will agree with me. You are not coming."

I lash out with my foot, kicking the couch. "Who is going to watch Henry?" I ask hostilely, silently hoping this is my way in.

Will's answer, "I'm taking him with me," cuts me deeply.

I stutter, "Will, I- I-"

He hangs up.

I look down at my phone angrily before throwing it at the couch.

"What's wrong?" Spencer asks as he fails to catch my bouncing phone.

I glare at him, "You know what's wrong!" I frown, control my anger, and apologize, "I'm sorry Spence."

He nods once.

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly, "Jenny is missing."

Spencer frowns, "Are you sure? Couldn't she have just changed her mind about going home and gone out with Garcia?"

I shake my head, "Penelope is on a date."

Spencer frowns, "How?" He sighs, "Never mind. What about Morgan, Rossi, Hotch, or Blake?"

I sigh, "Derek has a date. Dave is supposed to be working on his next book. Aaron should be home with Jack and Beth." I blush faintly, "Alex might possibly be reading the newest draft of my thesis."

Spencer opens his mouth.

I frown, "I am sure that she's not hanging out with Jenny."

Spencer frowns, "Cruz?"

I purse my lips, that name is strangely familiar, "I don't know them."

"He took over after Strauss-" Spencer cuts himself off.

I nod. Then I make a face, and raise an eyebrow, "Why would Jenny be hanging out with your new boss?"

Spencer opens his mouth and closes it again.

"Spence," I say cautiously.

"It's nothing," he says quickly, too quickly.

I cross my arms, "Spencer Walter Reid, I-"

He cuts me off, "I think JJ might be cheating on Will."

I stand up, "How could you say something like that Spencer!"

He stands and holds his hands up defensively, "I've caught them sharing strange glances, they've shown up and left together several times, and they stop talking when other people are around. Catherine I-"

I shake my head, "No! It's not possible. Either take it back, or put it out of your mind right now! Maybe they know each other but Jen loves Will, she would never cheat on him!"

Spencer frowns, "I-"

"Please Spence," I beg shamelessly, "She wouldn't. I know she wouldn't."

"Alright," he sighs, "I take it back."

I nod once.

"What is Will going to do?" Spencer asks quietly.

I glower at the floor, "He's going to call Aaron and then go to the BAU if Aaron doesn't know anything."

"And Henry?" he asks.

I scowl, "Will is taking Henry with him."

Spencer turns away from me, "I'm going to go change."

I open my mouth, "Spence, I-"

He interrupts me, "No you can't come Catherine."

I frown, "That wasn't what I was going to say."

He turns around and cocks his head, "Oh, then what is it?"

I blush, "I wanted to apologize for yelling at you."

Spencer closes the distance between us and wraps his arms around me. "It's okay sweetheart. You understand people better than I do, maybe I missed something."

I roll my eyes, "You read people just fine Spence, but this is Jenny."

He nods knowingly, "She's your blind spot."

I huff.

Spencer kisses my forehead, "I need to go change Catherine, just in case they call us in."

I nod sullenly and watch as Spencer disappears down the hall into our bedroom.

* * *

12:05 am

Spencer reappears in the living room just as I'm finishing putting the couch cushions back onto the couch.

"Do you want me to roll the sleeping bags?" he asks quietly.

I nod but don't turn around as I fold the blankets; I've already put the pillows away.

Spencer walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. He bends over a little and rests his chin on my head.

I tense slightly before relaxing into him.

"Hotch called," he whispers.

I freeze.

Spencer sighs, "Go get dressed. Hotch agreed that I can take you with me on the condition that you don't do anything except look after Henry."

I spin around and hug Spencer tightly, "Thank you."

Spencer tilts my head up, "You were right when you were talking to Will. JJ is your sister, and you deserve to be there if something happens. Hotch said he will send you home with a babysitter if you do anything stupid."

I kiss him briefly before spinning away and taking off down the hall in search of every day clothes.

* * *

12:30 am

Spencer stops me from running down the stairs.

I cannot hide my impatience, or my nervousness as we climb into Spencer's little blue car. I buckle my seatbelt and place my backpack on the floor by my feet.

"Catherine," Spencer says cautiously as he backs out of the parking space, "Did you make any phone calls while I was getting ready?"

I take a moment, trying to structure my answer in a way that won't see me left behind at our apartment. It doesn't look good so I bite the bullet and answer, "Yes."

Spencer purses his lips as if he knows my answer even before he asks; "Whom did you call?"

I chance a glance over at Spencer as he shifts gears and pulls out of the parking lot.

"Abby," I whisper.

Spencer frowns, "Not Emily?"

I turn my head to look out the window so he doesn't see me blushing, "I was trying to call Emily, but Abby answered her phone."

Spencer sighs, "Tell me what happened."

I'm unsure how to answer, "Spence I-"

"Catherine, Hotch will need to know what Emily has been told, so he isn't caught flatfooted when she calls," he grinds out. "It will be a when and not an if, if Abby mentions anything about the call she accidentally intercepted."

I cross my arms defensively, "Spencer-"

Spencer's eyes flash, "Catherine, this is important. Tell me what you told Abby."

I sigh and give in to his demands.

* * *

11:45 pm

4:45 am **London**

I pick up my cell phone and dial a number I know by heart simply because I've dialed it so many times over the past twenty months.

The muffled voice on the other end of the line answers with, "Hello?"

I frown, that is definitely not the voice I was expecting to hear. "Abby, why do you have Emmy's phone?" I ask.

"Catherine? What are you? Why? Why are you calling? What time is it?" she mumbles sleepily.

I take a deep breath, "I know it's late Abby but I need to talk to Emily."

I hear rustling. "It's not late Catherine, it's bloody early! I-" She stops, "Why are you calling?"

I roll my eyes, "Emily! Abby, I need to speak with Emily."

Abby snorts, "Tough luck kiddo, you're stuck with me. Princess Prentiss forgot her phone at home and I'm sure as hell not bringing it to her at four in the bloody morning! What's wrong? We weren't expecting to hear from you until this weekend. Did you get Maura's message? Did she say something that would necessitate you calling this early?"

"Yes I got the message, but that isn't why I'm calling. I arrived home late so I haven't listened to it yet. It's- it's Jenny, Abby…" I trail off.

I've got her attention now, "What about Jennifer?"

I can hear my voice trembling, "She didn't make it home. She's missing Abby. No one knows where she is."

Abby sighs, "And why do you need Emily?"

"Abby!" I gasp.

I can practically hear Abby crossing her arms, "No, I'm serious. Emily is running the London office of Interpol now Catherine. She can't just drop everything on the off chance that something is wrong. Even if something is, she's far too busy to help."

I am stunned, "Please Abby; Emily is supposed to save Jenny, she promised. I promised. I'm supposed to call if something goes wrong."

Abby sighs, "Catherine you are twenty-three, almost twenty-four years old, you need to grow up! We live an entire ocean apart. There is no need to bother Emily; she's supervising several really big cases right now."

I gulp down some air and try to respond, nothing comes out.

Abby continues not unkindly, "If, and that is a big if, something is wrong I'm sure your friends there will find her. If Jennifer actually has disappeared you need to let the team do what they do best, their jobs."

"Wait-" I stumble, "Abby! Please!"

"Good night Catherine," she says and hangs up.

* * *

12:50 am

Spencer sighs, "I'm sorry Catherine."

I close my eyes, "It's fine Spence."

He shakes his head, "No it's not. What Abby said was hurtful and unnecessary. I don't think you need to grow up I think you've grown up just fine." He whispers, "I love you."

I turn my head to smile at him, "Thanks Spence. I love you too."

"We'll be there soon." Spencer frowns, "Do you know if Henry is going to need anything extra tonight?"

I reach over and pat his hand, "I think Henry will be fine Spence. Will knows how to pack for him and I'm sure he doesn't know what's going on."

Spencer squeezes my hand, "We'll find her Catherine, I promise."

A few minutes later Spencer pulls over and parks the car.

I look up and frown. "Where are we? This isn't Quantico."

Spencer looks at me nervously, "Hotch asked me to make a stop on the way in."

I narrow my eyes, "What is going on Sp-"

A knock on my window stops me short and makes me jump. I look up to see Derek leaning against the car.

He gives me a half smile.

I unlock my door and start to get out of the car.

"Wait Catherine!" Spencer exclaims, "You can't get out of the car. Hotch said so."

I turn my burning eyes on him, "I am going to say hello to Derek and then I will get back into your car Spencer, but you will be telling me what is going on."

"Okay." Spencer gets out of the car and nods to Derek, "Morgan."

"Reid," Derek answers.

I roll my eyes.

Derek hugs me tightly, "How are you doing Princess?"

"'m fine," I mumble into his chest.

"No she's not," Spencer pipes up. "She's trying not to freak out," He pauses, "Did I read you properly?"

I shift uncomfortably.

Derek laughs and releases me, "I'm sure you did pretty boy." He looks down at me, "He's all yours now Princess."

"Jealous?" I stick my tongue out at him.

Derek laughs, "Not in the least." He cocks his head and stares at me, a frown on his face, "When was the last time that you slept?"

I cross my arms; "I was falling asleep when Will called."

Derek sighs, "You need to sleep more."

I raise an eyebrow at his miss-buttoned shirt, "So do you and you're clearly not lacking sleep for the same reasons I am. How's your girlfriend Derek?"

He laughs loudly.

I roll my eyes and turn around to see what Spencer is doing. I gasp, my knees start to tremble, and threaten to give out.

Derek grabs me before I can rush past him. He wraps his arms around me, pinning my arms to my sides.

I continue to panic and start to struggle, "No! Derek! No! That's Jenny's car, you have to let me go! What if she's in there?"

"JJ's-" Derek's arms loosen slightly and I press my advantage, however miniscule it might be. I stomp on his instep with one foot and kick the inside of his knee with the other.

Derek lets me go with a grunt of surprise.

I take off running across the street and come to a screeching halt beside Jen's car. "She's not in there," I whisper.

Derek follows and stops beside me, "If you would have just waited a minute I would have told you that JJ isn't inside her car, Catherine."

My legs do give out this time and Derek scoops me up before I hit the pavement.

"Come get your girl pretty boy." He says quietly, "It's all right Catherine. Just breathe."

I can hear Spencer come around the side of Jenny's car.

Derek transfers me into Spencer's waiting arms.

I don't bother to protest.

Spencer makes soothing noises and rubs my back.

"I thought she was dead," I mumble into his neck. "I thought you brought me to where she died and you were just going to leave me in the car."

Spencer sighs, "You're not thinking logically. If JJ really were dead I never would have brought you to the murder sight. I would have kept you as far away as possible. Also there would be lots of cops, and FBI agents, and yellow police tape."

I inhale Spencer's scent and try to calm my racing heart. Realistically I know he is correct, but this is Jenny we're talking about. I lift my head and look at Derek who looks back worriedly. "I'm sorry for kicking you," I whisper sheepishly.

Derek laughs, "At least I know you can react in real life the way I taught you to in practice."

Spencer sets me down and the three of us walk back to the car.

I curl up in the back seat with my backpack on my lap and try not to listen as Derek tells Aaron what they have and have not found.

* * *

1:30 am

We arrive and Spencer parks the car in his favourite spot.

Derek is out of the car in a flash, but I can't move. Reality is really settling in. Jenny is missing, but she didn't die in her car, nor where they found her cell phone. I'm terrified. _What if the team can't find her? What if she dies? I wonder if this is how Jenny felt when I was kidnapped?_

Spencer walks around the front of the car and opens my door for me. "Come to me," he murmurs affectionately.

I step out of his car and into his waiting arms. "Lie to me," I whisper.

Spencer frowns, then sighs. "Everything is going to be fine Catherine. Jen just decided to take a ridiculously long walk. No one is worried. Everyone is at home, asleep in bed, not on their way here."

"Liar," I murmur.

He hugs me tightly and kisses me gently, "We need to go inside now."

I nod once, swallow my tears and follow Spencer into the BAU.

* * *

AN2: Thanks for reading, please review. Just curious, how many people like Will as a character? Thoughts on Abby?


	2. Part 2

AN: Thank you for your reviews, favourites and those following along :)

AN2: I'm not sure how many people will read this AN, but if you do, please look up Happy Birthday Colin on Facebook. It's a really touching story. My sister and I heard about it on the radio and we sent a card to the kid.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau is mine along with any other characters you don't recognize.

* * *

**PART 2**

* * *

Take your time, hurry up

The choice is yours, don't be late

Take a rest as a friend

As an old

Memoria, memoria

Memoria, memoria

- Come As You Are, Nirvana

* * *

1:40 am

We meet Derek by the elevator; he's held the door for Spencer and me.

"How was your date?" Spencer asks.

Derek frowns, "How did you know I was on a date?" He looks at me.

I raise an eyebrow.

Derek rolls his eyes, "Never mind, I know how. It went fine Reid."

We get off on the sixth floor, where Alex is waiting by the glass doors, a file in her hands. "Did you find it?" she asks Derek.

He nods, passes her, and quickens his stride to catch up to Dave who is walking through the bullpen.

I walk by Alex and nod in greeting then I catch a single phrase on the paper she is reading, 'State Department'. My blood runs cold. I grab Spencer's elbow, "Spence, I need to tell you something."

He turns to me impatiently, "Catherine it needs to wait-"

I let go of his elbow and growl, "Spencer if you don't listen to me I will ignore Hotch's rule about not going into the conference room and I will talk to him, and not you."

"Catherine-" he frowns.

I cross my arms, "No Spencer."

He tries to move away, "I need to go to the briefing, but I will come find you right away afterwards. Then you can tell me what is so important."

I catch the edge of his shirt, "Spence it can't wait. Please!"

He frowns, "All right," Give me two minutes to talk to Hotch so he doesn't decide to fire me on the spot. Then we can duck into JJ's old office. It's still being used for storage."

I nod.

Spencer returns promptly, takes my arm and half drags me around the corner into the office. "Talk," he says harshly after closing the door, "Tell me what is so important that I am not where I should be right now. I need to help the rest of the team find JJ. We don't know how much time we've already lost."

I shiver slightly.

He sighs, "Please."

* * *

2:00 am

Aaron is speaking to Will, near the smart board but everyone else is already sitting down.

Spence interrupts them, "Hotch."

Aaron nods, "Reid." He frowns, "Catherine. I thought I was clear that you weren't to be connected to this case in any way at all. You should be in protective custody with Henry. Will is on his way there now."

I shudder. I don't think I have ever had Aaron's disapproving glare leveled at me before.

Spencer steps into the round table room, "Hotch, you were willing to listen to Will and I genuinely believe that you need to hear what Catherine has to say."

I look quickly back and forth between the two of them.

After an agonizingly tense minute Aaron nods.

Spencer places his hand on my back and guides me into the room I've been banned from since Emily was rescued more than two years ago.

Aaron crosses the room and whispers to me, "Does Will need to be here for this?"

I shrug and refuse to look directly at him.

Spencer looks at Aaron, frowns and makes a minute shake with his head.

Aaron turns around, "Okay, thank you for your help Will." He walks past me out the door, "Anderson."

"Catherine," Will says quietly, refusing to move.

"I'll tell you later Will," I answer, crossing my fingers behind my back.

He catches my eye, nods once and exits through the door next to me with Anderson.

* * *

2:05 am

"Cupcake," Penelope prompts me.

I blink and realize that everyone is sitting now, and staring at me. I swallow nervously.

Spencer holds out his hand to me and I walk over to him.

He pulls me down onto his lap and I feel my muscles relaxing as I curl into him.

"It's okay," Spencer whispers in my ear, "Tell them exactly what you told me. No one is going to be angry with you."

I chance a glance at the rest of my family. They certainly look more worried than angry. I open my mouth and the story tumbles out: "Jenny's job. It- it wasn't what everyone thought it was. She was doing something dangerous. I don't know what it was but she would be gone for a week or two, and come home with a tan. We burn, we don't tan."

I take a deep breath and exhale before continuing, "Jenny was devastated when she came home in April, so much so that she couldn't stop crying. She looked like she had been in a car accident, but she said nothing happened. She was fighting with Will then…" I trail off.

"I don't know how much you know about that." I pause, "I know she made Will promise to come to you Aaron, if something happened, but she made me promise to go to Emily. Emily made me promise the same thing." I sniffle, "I tried to reach her but I got Abby and she was crabby, and I don't think she's going to bring Emily her phone."

Spencer turns my head to face him and gently wipes away my tears.

I shiver, "Did you call her Aaron? Please say that you did."

"I did not, Catherine," he replies with a frown. "We don't have enough information to go on yet." He levels a gentler glare at me, "We were supposed to have a proper briefing."

I duck my head.

Alex frowns and asks the question no one else wants to ask, "Do you have specifics or any names Catherine?"

I shake my head, "I don't know what she was doing or with whom, but it wasn't a desk job. Emily might know more. They communicated when Emily was supposedly dead and Jen was working for the State Department."

"How?" Aaron asks with a frown.

"They would meet, and online Scrabble," the last word chokes me. "Henry- Jenny…" I stop myself from continuing.

Hotch senses my worry, "Alright thank you Catherine. You should go see Henry now. He's in my office."

I nod and stand up.

Spencer turns me around.

I look down at him.

Spencer clasps my left hand and kisses it, "It's going to be all right Catherine. We're going to find Jennifer."

I nod and walk out of the room. I feel like I'm on the way to my own execution. _What if they can't find Jenny in time? I don't really have very much information, but would it still be my fault for waiting so long to tell Spencer what little I do know?_

* * *

2:15 am

My feet stop moving when I see an unfamiliar agent posted outside the door to Aaron's office. _Where is Anderson?_ I half turn to go back inside the round table room, but someone has already shut the door and closed the blinds. I can only assume that Aaron has the briefing well underway. I frown and continue walking

"Hello Agent Ja-" He freezes, frowns deeply at me, and continues, "Name and identification."

"Name and badge number," I reply.

He narrows his eyes, "You first."

I reach into my bag and pull out my wallet and hand him my driver's license. "Catherine Jareau. You're guarding my nephew and brother-in-law inside Agent Hotchner's office."

His eyes flash back and forth between my face and my ID. He winces, "Sorry about the confusion. I thought you were someone else for a moment."

Stomping down on my initial reaction I raise an eyebrow, "Your turn."

He reaches into his suit pocket and slowly pulls out his identification.

I frown at the length of time it takes him, that there are no creases in the leather, and the fact that he shows it to me upside down. _How could Anderson put a newbie in charge of Henry's safety?_

"My name is Gregory Peters," he smiles and holds out his hand.

I shake it and am pleasantly surprised that I don't flinch or kick him when he puts his other hand on my shoulder.

I hand him back his ID and take a step to the side so his hand slides off my shoulder.

"I'm too new to know most of what's going on," he says slowly, "But let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you Agent Peters," I reply politely.

"Greg, please." He smiles winningly at me.

I want to reply, "Mrs. Spencer Reid," but I don't. Instead I nod and turn the door handle to Aaron's office. I know that Will is waiting for me on the other side of the door, so I take a deep breath and enter.

"Tell me what you told them," Is the first thing out of Will's mouth.

I frown, "Just that I think she was doing something dangerous for State and not a desk job like we were told."

Will frowns, "That shouldn't have gotten you an audience with the whole team without me."

I sigh, "They had some more questions, but I don't know anything useful Will."

He sighs and motions for me to sit down at the other end of the couch.

"What are you doing later today Will?" I ask with a yawn, "Are you and Henry going home with one of the Agents?"

"Henry has school and I have work," Will answers with irritation.

I frown, "And what about staying here? Hotch wants all three of us in protective custody, but you and Henry most of all. Have you told Henry anything about Jenny being missing?"

"No," he answers and turns his head away from me.

My jaw drops, "Will!"

"No!" he hisses, and turns to face me, "I am not telling him anything and neither are you. I forbid it."

I glare at my brother-in-law.

Will's phone rings, interrupting our glaring contest.

I sigh when he answers it. I know what's coming next.

Will hangs up, "I've been called in to work a case."

"Will," I start.

He scowls at me, "No Catherine. Neither of us are allowed to help, but I am not going to stay here and sit on my hands while they look for my wife who might already be dead!"

I cross my arms, "Henry is going to stay here with me."

"Henry has school," Will protests without any real vigor.

I roll my eyes, "So call the school and tell them he's sick."

Will frowns at my suggestion.

I stand up, "If you won't, I will. Henry doesn't know what's going on, and it is your right not to tell him. While Hotch doesn't want any of us to leave, you can be stupid and do what you want, but I am not letting you take my nephew out of my sight."

"I don't care about what Hotch says. I'm leaving now," Will replies and moves Henry from his lap to the couch.

I glare at him, "And what about Henry?"

"You're staying aren't you?" he answers angrily.

Henry shifts and mumbles in his sleep.

"Give him here," I say and hold out my arms.

Will picks up Henry and hands him over to me. Then he walks to the door.

"Aren't you even going to say good-bye?" I ask in dismay.

He sighs and comes back. Kisses Henry's head quickly and mutters, "Good bye."

I glare at his retreating back.

Setting Henry back down on the couch I check my bag thoroughly and am dismayed to find my phone missing. I swear in my head. _Now how am I supposed to reach Emily?_

* * *

2:30 am

I close the door quietly and nod at Peters who is still posted next to the window. "I've left Henry asleep on the couch," I say as I pass him by.

"Wait! Where are you going?" He asks nervously. "You're not leaving like the detective are you?"

I roll my eyes, "I'm not leaving permanently. I'm just going down the stairs, into the bullpen, out through the glass doors, and down the hall about two hundred yards."

His lips twitch, "Which direction?"

I give him a half smile, "Left."

I can see him doing the math in his head. He raises an eyebrow, "Garcia's Lair?"

I laugh; I can hear the capitalized letters. "Yes."

He smiles, "Okay. Thanks for telling me. Anderson said you might give me a hard time."

I try not to roll my eyes as I walk away.

I do exactly what I told Peters I was going to do. I walk through the bullpen, out through the glass doors and turn left, stopping in front of Penny's office. I turn the door handle slowly and stick my head into Penelope's office. "Hi Kevin," I whisper.

He jumps and starts babbling, "Hi Catherine, I didn't know you would be here. Though I suppose I should have, I mean JJ is your sister after all and-"

I cut him off, "It's okay Kevin. I'm not going to distract or bother you. I'm just looking for the blankets Penelope keeps here."

"Oh, um," He stops, "I think they're still in the bottom drawer of the filing cabinet."

"Thanks," I mumble and cross the room to reach the cabinet. I pull out two blankets, close the drawer and turn towards the door.

"Catherine?" he says warily.

I half turn to look at him, "Yes Kevin?"

"I'm sorry about JJ. We're doing our best to find her," he says with a frown and sad brown eyes.

"Thank you," I whisper, and hurry out the door.

* * *

2:45 am

Dave places his hand on my shoulder as I exit the office, "Come with me kiddo. I need to pick your brain."

I frown, "I don't have anything else to give you Dave, and I need to get back to Henry."

He walks with me down the hall, "You and I both know the first half of that sentence was bull." Dave opens the door for me, "But I can understand why you wouldn't want to leave the little guy." He stops talking as we walk thorough the bullpen and past Peters.

We enter the office and I sit down on the couch.

Dave mirrors my pose, "Now tell me when JJ started working for State."

"December," I answer firmly, moving Henry so he's curled up in my lap.

Dave snorts derisively, "Bullshit. Tell me the truth. JJ took several days off in the months preceding her official departure."

I shiver at the look in his eyes, "October."

He frowns.

I try to explain, "Strauss couldn't force the transfer until after I… They needed a concrete reason to move Jenny."

"Catherine," he says warningly.

"Please don't make me do this Dave," I plead.

Dave frowns, "We need all the information we can get if you want your sister back alive."

I know he is just trying to get a rise out of me but I can't help but gasp, "Of course I want her back alive!"

He cocks his head, "Even though she used you?"

I cross my arms and glare at him. "Jenny was very much against me going to Montreal," I mutter sullenly, and glare at him "Strauss pushed it through."

Dave opens his mouth.

I cut him off, "Spencer had no idea."

"Why do you think JJ was so upset when she came home in April?" Dave presses.

I clench my jaw and refuse to answer.

"Catherine," he says in frustration, "We need to know everything you do."

I glare at him, "No you don't. You can ask other questions but I refuse to answer that one."

He sighs, "What else do you know Catherine?"

I run my fingers through Henry's hair, "She was chasing someone and whoever it was, gave her nightmares. She would check in on Henry several times a night and bring him to bed with her in my room when Will was working."

Dave sits in silence and rubs Henry's back for a few minutes.

"Dave?" I whisper.

"Yeah kiddo?" he answers similarly.

I bite my lip. "Call Emily if Hotch doesn't. Please? She made me promise that I would call and I did, but…" I trail off.

He sighs before rising from the couch, "Kiddo, if JJ were going to hide something here, at the BAU, where would it be?"

I wrinkle my nose, "Her office. No one ever goes in there anymore."

Dave nods and exits Aaron's office, his shoulders ever so slightly hunched.

I watch him walk along the catwalk and back to the conference room.

* * *

3:15 am

"We're leaving," I announce to Agent Peters as I step out of Aaron's office with Henry snuggled into my arms.

"What? No. You can't!" he stammers.

I raise an eyebrow, "You can either come with me or you can stay here and then explain to my family how you neglected your duty."

He sputters incoherently.

I take pity on him, "The two questions you should have asked are; Why are you moving, and where?"

He looks helplessly at me.

I tap my foot impatiently.

"I don't want to lose my job," Is what he finally comes up with.

I roll my eyes. "That'll only happen if you don't come with us."

"But-" he protests.

I cut him off, "Ask the proper questions."

He frowns at me, "Where and why?"

I rest my chin on Henry's head, "We're going to Agent Jareau's old office."

He grimaces in confusion.

I sigh, "It's out of the bullpen and a little ways down the hall to the left of the elevators."

His mouth parts slightly, "Why?"

I narrow my eyes and look directly into his, "Because I refuse to watch my family search for my sister while I am unable to offer any assistance."

His brow furrows, "I'm not supposed to let you leave."

I raise an eyebrow; "You can grab my bag and Henry's backpack if you plan to come along. If not, I'll come back to get them."

He holds up his hands in supplication, "No! No, I'll get them. Wait for me! Please?"

I sigh and nod.

Peters rushes into the office and comes back out with the two bags in five seconds flat.

I'm mildly impressed.

We walk down the hall and stop outside of Jenny's old office.

I nod at the door and Peters opens it for me.

"You called them your family?" he asks in confusion.

I ignore the newbie and sigh at the mess in the office, "Henry, wake up for a minute please."

He whimpers in protest.

I kiss his forehead, "Leibling, I need you to stand up."

"Sleep Kit Cat," he mumbles.

I sigh and turn to Peters, "Can you move the files off the chair please?"

He sets the bags down by the door and does as asked.

"Thank you," I murmur and set my nephew down on the now vacant chair.

Henry grumbles but stays mostly asleep.

I start moving files off the couch and onto the desk.

Peters helps without being asked. "I'm going to have to tell someone you've switched offices," he says nervously.

"Relax," I say, "They're not going to do more than glare at you for a minute or two, then sigh."

"Huh?" He asks.

"This used to be my sister's office," I explain patiently, "Henry and I used to spend quite a bit of time here. My nephew will be happier when he wakes up if he is in familiar surroundings."

Peters frowns, "I suppose that makes sense."

Once the couch has been cleared, I start pulling it away from the wall.

"What are you doing?" He asks, confusion colouring his voice.

I answer simply, "I'm moving the couch."

"I know that," he says and pulls at the other end, "But why?"

I sigh, "So I can put my nephew behind it."

Peters makes a face, "Won't it be dusty?"

I sigh, "Yes."

He hesitates before asking, "Do you want me to find a vacuum?"

I shake my head, "It's sweet of you to offer, but it will wake Henry."

He frowns.

I tilt my head, "Check the crevice next to the filing cabinet. There should be one of those Swiffer mop things."

"Found it!" Peters replies a minute later.

"Shh!" I hiss at him, "Don't wake Henry!"

"Sorry," he whispers back.

I purse my lips.

"Why did you call them family?" Peters asks, bewilderment colouring his voice.

I sigh, "Most of them have known me for nearly a decade. They babysat me and I babysit Aaron's son Jack. We have family dinners. What else would I call them?"

"Oh," he mumbles.

Peters cleans the floor behind the couch and I thank him quietly as he leaves.

Then I settle down behind the couch with Henry.

* * *

9:30 am London

Abby rolls onto her side, "Damn it. I shouldn't have done that." She glares at Emily's phone for a few seconds before sitting up and throwing the blankets off her legs. Grabbing her clothes from a near by chair she proceeds to dress quickly.

Five minutes later Abby enters Maura's bedroom. She crosses the floor to the bed and shakes the sleeping child's shoulder gently, "Come on Maura, I need you to wake up."

"Mhmp?" is her answer.

Abby tries again, "Come on, sweat pea. Wake up."

"Abby?" Maura mumbles, "Where is maman? What time is it? Is something wrong?"

"We're running late and nothing more than the usual is wrong," Abby replies bitterly.

Maura blinks slowly, "Huh?"

Abby sighs, "Your maman is at work Maura and she forgot her phone. It is important that we bring it to her."

Maura buries her head in her pillow, "I still sick. You're sick too. I want to stay here."

Abby crosses her arms, "Maura, you are nine years old I am not letting you stay home alone."

"But Abby-" she protests.

Abby pulls the covers off her bed, "No Maura, you need to get up now."

"I'm tired, and my throat still hurts," she answers with a pout.

Abby checks Maura's forehead and frowns, "You can sleep in the car."

She grumbles, "Can't I-"

"No," Abby answers in a no-nonsense tone of voice.

Maura huffs, "Fine, but I'm not getting dressed," and climbs out of bed.

"That's fine," Abby replies as she turns to leave, "But you'll need your jacket, snow pants, scarf, mittens, and a hat."

Maura rolls her eyes and follows Abby out of her room.

* * *

3:57 am

"Peters," Agent Hotchner barks out.

"Yes sir?" Peters replies meekly, looking up at the almost complete team of profilers.

"Where are Catherine Jareau and William and Henry LaMontagne?" he demands.

"I was just on my way to find you," he starts.

"Well?" answers Hotch with a glare.

Peters straightens his spine, "Detective LaMontagne was called in to work."

Hotch frowns, "And what has happened to Catherine and Henry?"

Peters answers nervously, "Miss Jareau requested a change of venue for the two of them sir."

Hotch raises an eyebrow, "And you just let the people you are supposed to be protecting dictate what you do? What happened to following my orders?"

Peters looks around nervously, "Sir, the detective refused protective custody. He went directly to Anderson. And Miss Jareau said that she and the boy, Henry, would be moving whether I said yes or not, and that I could follow if I carried their bags."

Hotch purses his lips.

Rossi smiles.

Morgan smirks.

Reid's lips twitch.

Hotch asks finally, "Where did she go?"

Peters furrows his brow, "I believe she referred to it as Agent Jareau's former office, sir."

Hotch sighs.

Rossi closes his eyes.

Morgan winces.

Reid grimaces.

"Very well Peters, you may return to your post," Hotch says magnanimously.

"Hotch," Reid says quietly.

Hotch sighs, "Go with him Spencer. We have a few hours before I need to leave for the State Department and we've hit a wall for the moment." He turns to the rest of the men standing with him, "We should all get some rest."

"I'll go let Kevin and Garcia know," Morgan murmurs as he turns away.

"Still got that bottle of Glenfiddich?" Rossi asks Hotch quietly.

Hotch gives his friend a half smile, "It's a new bottle, but yes I have some."

Rossi claps his hands together; "I'll get the tumblers and meet you in your office in a few minutes."

Hotch nods and watches Reid grab his satchel from his desk and continue out of the bullpen.

* * *

AN2: Thanks for reading, please review :)


	3. Part 3

AN: Thank you for your reviews. I hope this chapter somewhat explains Abby's conversation with Catherine.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau is mine along with any other characters you don't recognize.

* * *

**PART 3**

* * *

Come doused in mud, soaked in bleach

As I want you to be

As a trend, as a friend

As an old

Memoria, memoria

Memoria, memoria

* * *

6:00 am

"Aaron," Rossi murmurs as he takes another sip of scotch.

"Dave," Hotch answers back.

He sighs, "You should call Emily."

Hotch frowns, "We don't have anything to tell her. I haven't spoken to State yet."

Rossi snorts, "You know that they're not going to help, and you do have something to tell Emily: JJ is missing. I'm pretty sure Catherine would have tried to call again if you hadn't had Morgan pick her phone from her pocket while they were near JJ's car and phone."

Hotch sighs and puts down his drink, "Where is the number for Emily's secure cell phone?"

Rossi holds up Catherine's cell phone.

"Does Morgan know you have that?" Hotch asks amused.

He shrugs, "I doubt it, since Morgan left in in his desk drawer." Rossi looks at Hotch pointedly over his tumbler, "You do know it's the first place Catherine is going to look once she asks Reid where her phone went. And you also know as well as I do, that Reid is not not going to tell her."

Hotch sighs, "He's not very good at refusing her anything is he?"

Rossi smiles, "Only when it's really important and somehow, I don't think the location of her cell phone qualifies."

Hotch laughs, "Well certainly not now that I'm planning to call Emily myself."

Rossi hands over the phone.

"Do you know the password?" Hotch asks, looking up from the locked screen.

Rossi smirks, "Garcia changed it to Jack's birthday so that you can look for it yourself."

Hotch frowns, "Catherine is going to be upset."

Rossi shrugs, "I'm sure she'll go to Garcia or Kevin to have it fixed if she doesn't know how to do it herself."

Hotch scrolls through Catherine's contacts until he reaches Emily's name. He looks up at Rossi and murmurs, "Here goes nothing."

* * *

11:00 am London

Abby flashes her ID badge and walks as quickly as possible through to the elevator with Maura completely asleep in her arms.

When they reach Emily's office Abby wakes Maura up, and leaning against the wall, stands her on her feet. "I need you to stay here Maura," she starts.

Emily's daughter yawns, and looks up at Abby with her big blue eyes, "But Abby, you woke me up and we came all this way. I'm sick and I want to see my maman."

Abby ruffles her hair, "It's a good thing you're cute kiddo."

Maura raises an eyebrow.

Abby smirks, "Very well, you can have one minute. Then you will have to wait outside while I talk to your mother."

Maura straightens the mess Abby made out of her hair and rolls her eyes. Then she spins around and bursts into Emily's office, "Maman!"

"Maura!" Emily exclaims, coming around from behind her desk. "What happened? What's wrong?"

Maura throws her arms around her mother and squeezes her tightly. Then she takes a step back, looks directly into Emily's eyes and says accusingly, "Abby woke me up because you forgot your phone at home."

Emily blushes faintly, "Oops." She continues, "And you, Chérie, and Abby were nice enough to bring it all this way to me?"

Maura nods.

Emily smiles down at her daughter, "Thank you. Are you feeling better?" Emily asks as she checks Maura's forehead.

Maura shrugs, "A little bit, but my throat still hurts and I feel funny."

Emily looks up to see Abby leaning against her doorframe.

Abby mouths, 'We need to talk.'

Emily nods once and places her hand on Maura's shoulder, "Chérie, don't argue with Abby when she tells you to take your medicine. I know it doesn't taste good but it will make you better. Now please wait outside while I talk with Abby."

Maura frowns but walks out of the office without voicing a complaint.

Abby crosses the room in three quick strides. "Here Emily," she says holding out Emily's phone.

The brunet grins at her friend, "Thanks Abby, you're a life saver! I can't believe I was so distracted that I forgot my phone at home. The Bauer case is really getting to me. I-"

"Emily," Abby interrupts her.

The cell phone rings.

Emily looks down at the display and frowns, "It's Catherine. Just a minute Abby, I need to answer this."

Abby swears quietly in the corner of the office.

"Hi Creirwy," Emily answers her phone happily.

Hotch winces, "Emily, it's Aaron, not Catherine."

"Hotch," she murmurs, then she frowns and looks at the clock outside her office, "I take it this isn't a social call? Where's Catherine? Why are you calling from her phone? Did something happen?"

Hotch sighs, "Catherine is physically fine Emily, but JJ is missing."

"Brief me on the plane," Emily says quickly.

"No don't leave yet!" Hotch answers: "I've got a meeting with the State Department at 9:00. We have research to do here before then, but Emily."

"Yes Hotch?" she answers with a sigh.

"Call Catherine when you have a minute." He pauses, "Preferably sometime before you land."

Emily frowns, "Where is she?"

There are muffled voices in the background.

"I have to go Emily," he says.

"Hotch!" she yells.

"It's Aaron Emily, how many times do I have to tell you? I'll call you again after I have my meeting with the State Department." Hotch replies just before hanging up.

Emily frowns down at her phone before turning back to Abby. "Did you know?" She asks acerbically, "Is that why you brought me my phone on your sick day?"

Abby winces, "I got a phone call."

Emily frowns, "Who from?"

"Catherine," Abby sighs, "She woke me up with some story about Jennifer not arriving home last night."

"And?" Emily raises an eyebrow.

Abby crosses her arms defensively, "I snapped at her and said a few things I shouldn't have."

Emily glares at her friend, "Why didn't you call me here immediately? I could have left already!"

Abby glares right back, "I fell asleep Emily! Maura isn't the only one who's been sick. And Catherine is still acting like a child. She needs to grow up and stop running to adults to fix everything all the time Emily. Besides, I had no real evidence that Jennifer was missing and even if she were, the BAU can handle it."

Emily crosses her arms and snarls, "Abigail Winter. That so-called child has been through more than enough to make most people shatter completely! She takes care of just about everything on her own but I promised her that I would come back home if something went wrong. I made her promise to call. And apparently the BAU can't handle it since Hotch called me in to consult."

Abby frowns, "You still think of it as home even after almost two years here?"

Emily raises an eyebrow, "Home is where the heart is Abigail, and most of my heart resides on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean."

Abby places a hand on Emily's arm, "Then why did you come here?"

Emily sighs, "I needed a change, nothing felt quite right after I returned."

Abby sighs, "When are you leaving?"

Emily reaches down under her desk and pulls out her go bag, "As soon as the jet is fueled. I need to make a stop first to see Clyde before going to Quantico."

"I'm sorry Emily," Abby whispers.

Emily brushes past Abby on the way out of her office, "It's not me to whom you should be apologizing Abigail. Catherine and Jennifer spring to mind. That is if we can find Jennifer before the people who kidnapped her, murder her."

Abby winces.

Emily crouches down next to her daughter, "Maura, I need to go away for a few days for work. You can stay with Abby or your mémère, but you have to go to school tomorrow or the day after."

Maura crosses her arms, "I don't want you to go."

Emily tucks one of Maura's stray curls behind her ears, "I know Chérie, but I don't have a choice. I have to go catch some bad guys and save the good ones."

Maura frowns, "Fine then, I want to stay at home with Abby. Mémère doesn't have time to read to me and Catherine won't know where to call me back if I leave."

Emily winces at the mention of Catherine's name.

Maura wraps her arms around her mother's shoulders, "I love you maman."

Emily hugs her back and kisses her forehead, "I love you too Maura. I will call you when I have time." She stands up, "Ms. Winter, you're in charge until I return."

Abby cringes.

Emily picks up her bag and walks away.

Maura looks up at her, "Maman used your last name. What did you do?"

Abby sighs, "It's a long adult story Maura."

Maura pouts and crosses her arms, "You never tell me anything important."

Abby prays for patience, "This isn't important for you to know Maura, it only concerns your mother and I."

Maura huffs, "I don't have to go to school. Are you going to drive me home?"

Abby closes her eyes briefly, "I have to stay here Maura. Now, I've got a change of clothes for you and your book bag filled with homework in the boot. You can change in the bathroom and then we will go find breakfast. I'll find someone to drive you home and stay with you afterwards."

* * *

7:15 am

Spencer's phone dings twice.

I struggle to reach consciousness.

Spencer shushes me as I start to squirm. "It's okay Catherine, Hotch is just letting me know I have fifteen minutes before he needs to see me."

"Don't move pillow, you're warm," I mumble into his chest.

He snickers, "Wake up sweetheart."

I groan in protest and pull the blanket up over my head.

Spencer laughs quietly and pulls the blanket off, "Catherine."

I pretend he isn't talking.

He tries to get my attention again, "Catherine. Hotch called Emily. She's going to be on the next flight out. We're going to brief her on the plane."

I lift my head to look at Spencer's face and sigh in relief when I see the truth shining in his eyes.

"I have to get up now sweetheart," Spencer whispers into my ear.

I grumble wordlessly.

Spencer smiles, "I love you too."

I smile at him and cover my mouth as I yawn.

Spencer kisses my forehead, "I'm going to leave you here with Henry, okay?"

I nod and move off Spencer to sit on the couch.

He stands up and stretches, "There are clothes for you in my go bag under my desk."

"Thank you Spence," I whisper and stand up as well. "Oh no, I have to call the school and I can't find my phone! I'm sure it was in my pocket when we left the apartment."

Spencer holds up his hand, "I called the school for you last night and left a message."

"Thank you!" I whisper gratefully. "Spencer," I ask slowly, "Did you take my phone?"

"No," he answers quickly.

I frown, "If it wasn't you, do you know who it was?"

He doesn't say anything.

I sigh, "Tell me Spencer, please? I swear I won't be angry with you."

He frowns, "Hotch told Morgan to take it."

I frown in consternation, but at least I know that my phone is likely to be hidden in Derek's desk drawer. He really should find a new place to hide things.

"Sorry I didn't tell you last night, Hotch told me not to," Spencer hugs me tightly. "I love you Catherine," he whispers into my hair before crossing to the door.

I whisper, "I love you," as he walks out.

I yawn and take a peek behind the couch.

Henry is still fast asleep in his blanket nest.

I smile down at him before lying back down on the couch and pulling the blanket back over me. I miss Spencer's body heat already.

* * *

8:10 am

I wake up to a huge expelling of air from my lungs. I cough and gasp, trying to catch my breath. When I finally do, I take a look around for what could have possibly caused such a violent reaction. I sigh when I finally notice Henry sitting on the opposite end of the couch.

I frown, "What time is it Henry?"

He scrambles over my legs, grabs my wrist and looks at my watch. His little nose scrunches, "I don't know, your watch has lots of numbers and they're upside down."

I gently pry his fingers off my wrist and turn my watch to face myself. "It's just after eight Henry. Why are you awake?"

He pouts, "Where is here? Why are we here and not at home? Why are you with me? Where's mommy? Where's daddy?"

I hold up one end of the blanket, "Come lie down with me Henry."

"Catherine," he crosses his little arms, "Where's my mommy?"

"Lie down and I'll tell you," I say with a sigh.

"Okay," he chirps happily and squirms under the blanket to lie down on top of me. "Tell me now! I'm lying down now," he reminds me.

I smile slightly, my mind working furiously to come up with a plausible story. "Do you remember anything from last night Henry?" I ask to test the waters.

He frowns, "Daddy woke me up. It was cold outside."

I bite my lip, "Do you remember anything else?"

His nose wrinkles, "No."

I sigh in relief.

"Kit Cat where is my mommy?" he asks in a small voice.

I'm trying to put off answering that particular question as long as possible, "Do you remember the rule about questions Henry?"

He sighs, "Yes."

"And what is the rule?" I ask lightly.

"Questions are answered in the order they are asked," he intones.

I roll my eyes, "And what does that mean?"

He frowns, "I have to wait to hear about mommy because I asked other questions first."

I run my fingers through his hair, "That's right leibling."

Henry pouts.

I start with his first question, "Do you recognize where we are Henry? You've been here before."

Henry looks around the room, "It looks like mommy's old office, but it's all messy."

I nod, "It is. Now as for why we are here and not at home, your daddy brought you here last night."

He frowns, "Why? Where is-"

I tap his nose with my finger, "Be patient Henry."

He huffs.

I smile at his frustration, "I am here because your uncle Spencer is here. Now-"

"Mommy?" He asks hopefully.

I wince internally, "Yes, now I can tell you about your mommy. Since today is a weekday, she is not at home."

"Is she here?" He turns towards the door, "Can I see her?"

His hopeful face is breaking my heart, "No, leibling. She's not in the building today."

"She's gone on another trip?" Henry asks sadly.

I take a deep breath and prepare to tell the most egregious lie to my five-year-old nephew to date, "Yes."

"And daddy?" he asks tentatively, "Can I see my daddy?"

I bite my lip, "Your daddy is at work today Henry."

"Kit Cat?" he mumbles.

"Yes leibling?" I reply.

He rolls onto his stomach, "Don't I have school today?"

"Nope," I pop the p.

He frowns, "Today is Wednesday. Mommy says I always have school on Wednesdays."

I wince, "Not today Henry. Today we're playing hooky."

"Huh?" He replies eloquently.

I smile at him. "Neither you, nor I are going to school today. We're going to stay here and have a day off."

Blue eyes lit up in excitement, "Are we going to play games?" He asks.

I laugh quietly, "We can play games later, but first we're going to have a nap, and then breakfast."

"I'm not tired," he mumbles.

"But I am very tired Henry," I whisper.

"Okay," he sighs, "I can lie down with you. But not too long, promise?"

I kiss the crown of his head, "Henry, you don't have to lie down with me. You can read one of the books your daddy packed for you behind the couch."

"Okay!" he says and slips out from under the blanket.

Inspiration strikes, "Just a minute Henry. I need to introduce you to someone."

He turns back to me, a questioning look on his face.

I stand up and walk across the room.

Henry follows behind me, "Who is it?"

I open the door and nod at Agent Peters who is leaning against the opposite wall.

"Henry," I place my hand on his shoulder to stop him from hiding behind me, "This is Agent Greg Peters."

"Hello Henry," Peters says.

"Hi. Why are you standing there?" Henry asks curiously.

Peters looks at me helplessly.

I frown; I obviously haven't thought this through adequately, "Do you remember playing guards with Jack?"

Henry looks up at me, "Yes. It was boring."

I stifle a laugh, "Agent Peters is playing guards too."

Henry looks Peters up and down, "He's old like uncle Spencer, Kit Cat. Is he playing with Jack?"

My lips twitch, "No Henry, Gregory isn't playing with Jack. Jack is at school."

Henry wrinkles his nose, "Then who is he playing with?"

Peters looks worried.

I bite my lip before answering, "He doesn't know whom he is playing with Henry, that's what makes this game so special."

Henry looks at me in confusion.

I think frantically, "Peters is going to follow us around all day so that he can find out who he is playing with."

Henry looks at me skeptically, "Okay."

"Say good bye to Agent Peters leibling," I say and turn him around, "I'm going to have a nap and you're going to read quietly."

Henry waves, "Bye."

"Bye Henry," Peters answers.

* * *

1:00 pm London

Abby picks up her phone and dials a familiar number.

The phone connects, "Clyde Easter speaking."

"Clyde," she replies weakly.

"Abigail," the tone is concerned but formal.

She sighs, "I'm calling to remind you that I still need someone to replace me today. Maura has strep throat and I've still got the flu. I'm going to keel over if I have to stay here in London and not at home in bed much longer."

The frown is evident in his tone of voice, even over the telephone, "Where is Emily? Why is she not the one dealing with this?"

Abby sighs, "Emily is flying to Quantico, Clyde. Jennifer Jareau appears to have been abducted. I know she stopped by to tell you this morning." She frowns, "You're the one who said she could go back anytime anything bad happened when you offered her the job."

Clyde frowns, "Yes, I do believe I said something along those lines. Ah, here is that memo." He pauses, "Abigail, do you really think Emily would have taken the job in London if I had not agreed to that stipulation?"

Abby rolls her eyes, "Are you going to send someone or not?"

He sighs, "Where is your third in command? Why is Lancaster unable to take over?"

Abby growls, "Clyde, you as head of Interpol are well aware that we, the London office, have been working two enormous cases simultaneously. Lancaster is running one of the investigations. He cannot possibly supervise both."

He lets out an annoyed snort, "Why is this my problem?"

There is more than a note of censure in Abby's voice, "Because you were supposed to come replace Emily, you twit! So that I could go home, and I want to go home, you bloody little river."

Clyde snorts, "You haven't called me that in ages."

Abby huffs, "Then you obviously haven't needed a proper scolding while I was within earshot."

He laughs, "Relax little pearl, I'm already on my way. I'll be there in under an hour."

"I'm going to box your ears when you get here for making me wait and having me on," Abby mutters without an excessive amount of malice.

Clyde makes a humming noise, "You haven't sent little Maura home yet have you?"

Abby frowns, "No, I haven't. She's fast asleep on Emily's couch."

Clyde nods decisively, "This will save time then, I'm going to have Alfie drive both of you home."

She sighs, "Clyde-"

Clyde smiles smugly, "Don't argue with me Abigail or I might just call Ambassador Prentiss and let her know how her granddaughter is fairing."

Abby shudders, "You wouldn't!"

"Of course I would Abigail." Clyde replies with a smile. "Cheerio!" He hangs up.

* * *

10:30 am

Henry climbs up onto my lap, "Kit Cat?"

I look down at my nephew, "Yes Henry?"

"I'm hungry," he announces as his stomach growls in agreement.

I look at my watch, "Did you eat your granola bar?"

He nods, "Yes."

I push my never ending pile of essays out of the way, "And the fruit in your lunch bag?"

He nods again, "Yes."

I sigh, "Alright leibling, let's collect Agent Peters and go find us some real breakfast."

"Whoopee!" Henry exclaims happily. "I want ice cream for breakfast Kit Cat."

I laugh, "Not on your life Henry, your mother would kill me." I inhale sharply at the turn of phrase and try my best not to empty what little is left in my stomach onto the floor.

Henry looks at me funny.

I smile weekly at him and gesture towards the door.

Peters yawns when he greets us.

"Has anyone spelled you yet?" I ask curiously.

He blinks at me, confusion evident.

I sigh, "Have you had a break? Has someone come to replace you?"

Peters nods, "Agent Anderson was here earlier, I just got back from taking a powernap. He left but should be coming back soon. I believe Agent Hotchner said they can't spare anyone else for the moment."

I roll my eyes. Trust Aaron to give me the newbie because they didn't want him to get in their way.

I place my hand on Henry's head, "We're going down for breakfast. I believe we have waited long enough for Aaron to be well into his meeting with State"

"Wait, please! I have to clear it with someone first," Peters says quickly. "Unless you would like me to send for something and you and the little guy could stay here."

Henry crosses his arms, "I'm not little. I'm five!"

I shake my head at Peters.

He nods and disappears into the bullpen.

Henry stomps his foot, "I'm not little!"

I scoop him up and settle him on my hip, "None of that leibling. It's rude and don't think for a second that your parents would let you get away with it."

"But you do it sometimes," Henry mutters petulantly.

I sigh, "Yes, and I'm an adult, and certain other adults tell me off when I do."

Henry giggles, "Like mommy and uncle Spencer."

I flinch, "Yes, Spence does do that."

Henry's stomach growls loudly. "Breakfast Kit Cat," he murmurs wistfully.

"Just a minute, leibling. We need Agent Peters to come back. Do you remember the game he's playing?"

Henry frowns, "He's playing guards. But I don't want him to come with us Kit Cat. Make him go away!"

I sigh, "I wish I could Henry, but the rest of our family will be mad if we leave him behind to play alone."

Henry pouts, "I don't like him. I want my mommy. Kit Cat make mommy come home!"

I baulk, and swallow the bile rising up my esophagus. "Oh sweetheart," I kiss his forehead.

"Please?" he asks.

I flinch at his pleading tone, "Your mommy is working Henry. I can't make her come home anymore than you can make the sun rise in the morning."

Henry scrunches up his nose. "I don't care about the sun. Can uncle Aaron make mommy come home?"

I wince and take a minute to calm my racing heart, "Aaron is not here right now, but he's working on bringing Jenny home to us."

"Why-" Henry's next question is cut off by Peters reappearing.

"Sorry about that," he says, "We're all set to go now. Agent Morgan is now aware of where you are going."

"What about Dr. Reid?" I ask as we walk the few short yards to the elevators.

"He's somewhere with Ms. Garcia and Agent Anderson."

I nod and we step into the elevator.

"I want ice cream for breakfast Kit Cat," Henry reminds me with a whisper in my ear.

I let out a strangled laugh and hug my nephew tighter.

* * *

AN2: Thanks for reading, please review :)

AN2: I am going to take a moment for shameless self promotion: For those of you interested, I posted a new story under the Law & Order SVU category. The story was originally supposed to be a trail for issues I'm having while writing Maybe Alice, but it works much better as a fully developed story as opposed to an excerpt.


	4. Part 4

AN: This one is quite a bit longer than originally intended. I hope you enjoy it :) I have a final exam in just under three weeks and four essays due before that and a fifth shortly after so I will be ducking out for a little while. I may or may not post the next chapter in two weeks. I'll have to see where I am in my exam prep.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau is mine along with any other characters you don't recognize.

* * *

**PART 4**

* * *

And I swear that I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

Memoria, memoria

Memoria, memoria

* * *

12:30 pm

I hear footsteps coming down the hall. I turn to my nephew, "Henry, promise me that you're going to stay behind the couch okay?"

Henry nods without looking up from his book.

I stiffen as the office door is opened and place a hand on Henry's shoulder to remind him not to move.

Silence for a moment then, "Agent Peters, did you lose your charges again?"

Peters splutters, "What? No! They haven't left! They're in there, I swear!"

Henry shrugs off my hand and stands up, "Hi Grandpa!"

I hide my face in my hands and bite my tongue to stop any hysterical laughter from escaping. I can picture just how Dave's jaw drops and the brief appearance of panic mixed with happiness in his eyes every time Henry or Jack call him grandpa.

Eventually Dave says, "What did you just call me?"

I poke Henry's ribs.

"Uncle Dave!" Henry replies, grinning unrepentantly.

"Henry, what are you doing back there?" Dave asks as he closes the door behind him.

Henry ducks down for a second before jumping back up and holding out a book, "Kit Cat and I are reading!"

I can hear the smile in Dave's voice as he responds to my nephew, "That sounds like fun buddy, can you make Catherine come out from behind the couch?"

Henry nods enthusiastically. He turns his head and whispers, "Kit Cat stand up! Grandpa wants to talk to you."

I stand up slowly. "Dave?" I greet him cautiously, questions threatening to burst out of my mouth.

Dave shakes his head sadly.

I sigh, pick up my nephew, and hug him tightly.

Henry squirms slightly, "Put me down Kit Cat, I want to read some more."

I shake my head, "Not right now Henry."

He pouts melodramatically.

"Henry," Dave calls out across the office, "Are you hungry? Do you want to eat lunch now?"

Henry's head whips around, "Yes!" He wriggles.

I set him down.

Henry runs around the end of the couch and across the room, he throws himself at Dave.

"Whoa there little man," Rossi says and scoops him up.

Henry turns on the puppy dog eyes, "Will you let me have ice cream for lunch Uncle Dave? Kit Cat wouldn't let me have any for breakfast."

I roll my eyes.

Dave laughs, "I don't think so buddy, you need real food for lunch before you can have dessert."

"Let's go now!" Henry shouts, "I'm hungry and I want ice cream for dessert!"

"Use your indoor voice please Henry," I can't help but comment from my place behind the couch.

"Yes Kit Cat," Henry mumbles with an exaggerated sigh.

Dave frowns, "Are you not coming with us?"

I shrug and don't move.

He sighs.

Henry frowns, "Aren't you hungry Kit Cat?"

I shake my head and deny the growling of my stomach, "No leibling, I'm not."

Henry holds out his arms to me, "But I want you to come."

"I-" I sigh and look down at my sock clad feet.

"Catherine," Dave says gently, "Spencer is going to meet us in the cafeteria."

_Spencer is there maybe I can do this._ I look up and take a hesitant step forwards before stopping. "I can't," I mumble despondently.

Dave sighs and opens the door. "Peters," he barks out, "You are relieved from duty for the next few hours, send Dr. Reid back here before you find somewhere to nap."

Peters frowns, "Agent Rossi, sir, Agent Anderson said that I'm not supposed to leave them alone."

Dave growls, "I don't care what Anderson said, I'm telling you to move!"

Agent Peters flees.

Henry giggles, "Can you make anyone else do that uncle Dave?"

He chuckles, "I wish kid."

Henry watches me with a curious expression on his face, "Kit Cat?"

"Yes leibling?" I respond quietly, still unable to move.

"Put me down please," Henry whispers to Dave.

He sets my nephew down.

Henry runs across the office and stops in front of me, "Don't you want to come eat with me and Grandpa?"

My lips twitch involuntarily at the resignation that crosses Dave's face.

"Kit Cat?" Henry prompts me.

I look down at his blue eyes, the ones that match Jenny's and my own. I can feel the bile rising up my throat and I swallow reflexively.

Henry holds out his arms, "Please?"

I bend down and pick him up.

Henry wraps his arms around my neck.

I kiss his forehead, "Don't you want to have lunch with Dave and maybe Penelope or Derek on your own like a big boy?"

Henry shakes his head, "Don't leave me Kit Cat."

My heart hurts. I sigh, "I wouldn't leibling."

Henry rests his head on my shoulder, "Do you promise?"

"I promise," I whisper into his blonde hair.

"Good," he replies and kisses my cheek.

Spencer appears in the doorway. "Peters sent me, what's wrong?" he asks, directing his question at Dave.

Dave sighs and nods in my direction, "Your girl doesn't want to leave the office."

I flinch slightly.

Spencer sighs, "Sweetheart?"

I bite my tongue again to stop the flood of tears that threaten to spill from my eyes.

Spencer crosses the room and wraps his arms around both Henry and myself. "What's wrong?" he murmurs into my hair.

"Spence I can't leave," I mumble into his chest.

"Henry," Spencer says, "Can you go stand with Uncle Dave so Catherine and I can talk in private for a minute."

Henry regards his godfather seriously, "I'm not leaving without her. Kit Cat promised she wouldn't leave me."

Spencer laughs quietly, "That is good promise to have. Any chance you can get Catherine to make the same promise to me?"

Henry looks at him strangely and frowns, "Mommy said you both did that already, or was it that you were going to?"

Spencer smiles at both of us, "Yes Henry." Then he whispers conspiratorially, "Henry, I know for a fact that your grandpa needs a hug, and so does your fairy godmother."

Henry's eyes light up. "Put me down Kit Cat," he commands, then as an afterthought he adds, "Please."

Spencer takes Henry from my arms when I don't want to let him go and sets him down on the floor.

Henry skates across the floor in his socks, a huge grin on his face.

"Shoes Henry," I manage as he almost crashes into Dave's legs again.

Henry plops himself down on the floor and pulls on his shoes.

I know that he is glaring at the laces as he ties them.

"I'm ready!" Henry announces and leaps to his feet. He pulls on Dave's hand, "Come on, we need to go find my fairy godmother!" He stops in the door and looks back at Spencer and myself.

"We'll meet you in a bit Henry," Spencer answers his unasked question.

Henry waves, "Okay! Bye!"

Spencer tilts my head up, "Will you tell me what's going on now Catherine?"

I avert my eyes.

He sighs, "Please sweetheart, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

"It's been hours and hours Spence and you still have no idea where Jenny is!" My chin trembles, "What if she's dead?"

Spencer flinches. "It's finally sunk in then," he inhales and exhales slowly, "I wondered when it would since you were mostly alright earlier."

Tears carve lines down my cheeks and I mumble, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I knew it was coming," Spencer mumbles and kisses my forehead. "Don't you think you would know if Jennifer were…" he trails off

I sigh, "If you had asked me when I was little, I would have said yes."

"And now?" he asks curiously, handing me his spare handkerchief.

I shrug and dry my eyes, "I don't know Spence. I don't want her to be dead, but it's been thirteen hours or more and you still don't know where she is… Do you? Please tell me you have leads."

With a blank face he repeats my words back to me in a monotone, "We have leads."

I flinch.

Spencer sighs, "You know I can't tell you anything Catherine but hold on to your hope. If you can't I'll hold on to it for you."

"Hope can be paralyzing Spencer," I mumble into his chest.

He hugs me tightly.

I hug him back.

Spencer lets me go, "Put your shoes on and I'll take you down to eat lunch."

I nod and slip on my shoes. I make it all the way to the door before I stop.

Spencer sighs, "It's the room right? You feel safer here?"

I nod and sniffle.

Spencer wraps his arms around me from behind.

I spin around, bury my face in his chest, let go, and give into my tears again.

"Shh," He murmurs and rubs my back, "It's going to be okay. We are going to find your Jenny and she'll be fine."

Spencer waits out my tears then taps the hand I'm still holding his handkerchief in, "Dry your eyes, then you can wash your face in the bathroom."

I frown, "Spencer?"

He wipes my tears away with his thumbs, "Yes Kitty Cat?"

I bite my lip, "What about the rules? I'm- I'm in Jenny's office and no one has kicked me out. You're even letting me go in to the bathroom on my own. Aren't you all going to get into trouble?"

Spencer raises an eyebrow.

I blush, "I mean Dave sent Peters away and you're not calling someone else to escort me. Spence what is going on?"

He sighs, "You're in protective custody Catherine, the rules are different. Or rather, Hotch has rescinded a few of the ones the committee set, at least for the duration of this case." He tugs on my messy braid, "We need you safe and we need you to feel safe not just for yourself, but also for Henry. JJ's old office has no windows and you feel safer there than you do in Hotch's office. Don't you?"

I nod.

"Then it's settled," He leans down and brushes his lips against mine.

"Love you," I mumble.

"And I love you." Spencer takes my hand, "Come on, you don't want Henry to see you with red eyes, he'll worry."

I smile, he's right.

Spencer opens the office door, "And don't think I am unaware of your refusal to eat a proper breakfast this morning."

"I was too nervous," I mumble, "There were too many people."

He sighs and looks back at me, "That's why I'm only taking you to pick out lunch. We can eat in the bullpen or back in the office." Spencer raises my hand to his lips, "I'll protect you."

"I know you will," I whisper as he drags me off down the hall.

* * *

1:30 pm

"I know it was you," Dave declares as he pushes the last cupcake across the table towards me.

"What exactly are you accusing me of?" I ask innocently, as I unwrap the paper from my cupcake.

He looks sternly at me, "You taught Henry and Jack to call me grandpa."

Inwardly I'm snickering but what everyone else sees is my jaw dropping, "What a specious accusation!"

Dave splutters then laughs, "It is not! They say it more frequently after spending time with you. What have you bribed them with?"

_Oh if only he knew it was Spencer who started it._ I smirk, "I can neither confirm, nor deny anything to do with either of your allegations. I can only hypothetically postulate what those two little boys in particular may or may not have been bribed with. I-"

Dave puts his hands up to stop me from continuing, "I give up."

I grin at him.

Spencer, keeping his face carefully blank, tightens the arm he's got wrapped around me.

I lean back against him and nibble on my cupcake.

Henry looks up at Dave in confusion from his place on Penelope's lap, "But aren't you my grandpa?"

Dave hides his face in his hands and sighs, "Yes Henry, I suppose I am."

Penelope hides her face in Henry's hair.

I burst out laughing.

Spencer grins at Dave.

"Day-vid," I say slowly, drawing his name out.

He looks up at me suspiciously.

My smile is saccharine, "Did you take my cell phone from Derek's desk drawer?"

Dave raises an eyebrow, "Why do you think it was me?"

I hold up one finger, "Spencer knows better," Another two fingers, "Kevin wouldn't dare touch my phone and Alex is too smart to be involved." I raise an eyebrow; "If Penelope knew Derek had swiped it she would have made him return it to me right away, but not if you approached her with my cell."

Penelope blushes.

I smirk, "That leaves you."

Dave's lips twitch, "What about Aaron?"

I roll my eyes, "He's the one who had Derek pinch it in the first place. There's no way he'd keep it from me, especially since he's already called Emily."

Dave smiles at me and pulls my phone from his pocket. He holds it out to me; "I was planning to return it to you when I came to collect you and Henry for lunch."

I shiver and take my phone back.

Henry pipes up, "Is Auntie Emily coming to visit you and mommy Kit Cat? Will I get to see her too?"

Every single adult at the table stiffens, myself included.

I sigh, it's obvious that no one wants to field this question. "Yes Henry, Emily is coming to visit but she has to do some work with the rest of the team before we can have fun."

Henry wrinkles his little nose, "Their work is boring."

I wince, "It might be boring for you leibling, but it is very important. Do you remember what your mama told you about her work?" _Why do I do this to myself?_

Henry nods and smiles at me, "Mommy helps to catch the bad guys. Jack says mommy and uncle Aaron are superheroes."

My voice cracks, "Yes she does, and they are all superheroes Henry."

Spencer rubs my back.

Dave closes his eyes.

Penelope tightens her grip on my nephew and stands up, "Come along little prince, we're going to try out that new puzzle in my office. Catherine is going to take a nap now."

Henry looks at me, "Kit Cat?"

I force a smile, "It's alright leibling. Go have fun with your fairy godmother. I'll see you in a bit."

He nods and wraps his arms more securely around Penelope's neck.

* * *

3:00 pm

I hear the whisper of the door opening. I look up from my papers and gasp, "Emily!"

She's leaning against the doorframe, "Creirwy," she says and holds out her arms.

I rush into them and hug her tightly. "I called, I swear I did. But-" I cut myself off.

Emily tightens her grip on me and makes hushing noises. "It's okay, Creirwy. I know what happened. I'm glad you kept your promise even if it didn't work out as we had originally envisioned," she says quietly.

I sniff slightly, trying to stem my impending tears.

Emily presses something into my hand.

I look down and flinch at the tea light resting innocently on my palm. "Emily," I breathe out.

"Catherine," she returns cautiously.

I start trembling, "She's not dead Emily. That's why you're here; to rescue Jenny."

Emily runs her fingers through my long, unbound hair, "That doesn't mean you can't light the candle and ask Jessie to look out for her while you wait."

Tears fill my blue eyes and I look up into Emily's brown ones.

"Shh, Creirwy," she whispers, "Everything is going to be fine. We're going to find Jen and I'll bring her back to you and Henry."

"I hope you do a better job than Jenny did saving you." I can't resist the jab. _It's been almost two years and I'm still upset that Emily left. Spencer thinks I'm upset because she didn't take me with her. I'm never quite sure if he's right or not._

Emily winces.

"I'm sorry," I whisper. "Will you stay with me?"

Emily sighs, "I need to go help the rest of the team Catherine. I haven't even told them I'm in the building yet, though they are aware I've landed."

I bite my lip, "Just for a few minutes, please Emmy?"

She nods, "I'll just tell the agent outside the door where the others can find me."

I sigh, "His name is Gregory Peters. He introduced himself as Greg."

She raises an eyebrow.

I roll my eyes, "He's new and ostensibly my guard dog."

Emily's lips twitch.

"I almost introduced myself as Mrs. Spencer Reid," I grin cheekily at her.

She barks out a laugh before covering her mouth, and stopping the rest of her impending giggles. Emily looks at me, then my hand, and smiles tenderly.

I blush.

She grins at me and leaves the office to speak with Peters.

I tune out their conversation as I quickly search Jenny's old office for something to put the candle on. I've settled on the small coffee table in front of the couch and am in the process of removing Henry's colouring book and toys when Emily comes back in to the office.

She watches me for several seconds before finally saying, "I need to see Hotch and the team for a few minutes so they don't barge in here and disturb us. Will you be alright on your own?"

I half nod half shrug.

Emily sighs and exits the office.

* * *

4:00 pm

When Emily returns she hands me my water bottle. "Drink some," she instructs me, "You don't want to get dehydrated."

I roll my eyes and comply with her pushy but reasonable demands. _I wonder who gave it to her; I know I forgot it on the lunch table._

Emily comes to a stop next to me, "Your last defense is in April isn't it? Then graduation, and…" she trails off with a silly grin on her face.

I ignore the second half of her statement and frown, "Are you still coming to my graduation Emmy? This one is the most important."

Emily drops her go bag and kicks it under the desk, "Of course I'll be there Catherine. I've already booked two weeks off. You receiving your Phd is very important, and I'm so proud of you. I wouldn't miss it for the world."

I nod quickly.

She sighs, "You know I would have been at the last one if I could Creirwy."

I nod again, slower this time.

"Say something," Emily begs.

I ignore her pleading and continue searching through the pockets of my bag.

"Catherine," I can hear the frown in her voice, "Where is Henry? Is he with Will?"

I shake my head and wave my hand at the couch, which is still pulled away from the wall. I frown and start looking through the unlocked and empty desk drawers.

"Creirwy?" Emily places a hand on my shoulder.

I flinch slightly, not expecting the physical contact. "Do you have matches?" I whisper without turning around.

"Look at me?" Emily asks pitifully.

I turn around but don't raise my head.

She places her finger under my chin.

I lock my eyes on hers and all my fears come tumbling out again, "You have to find her Emmy! I can't lose her and I know that I can't raise Henry the same way Jenny would. I don't know what to do! I don't know what to tell him! Will has forbidden me from saying anything about Jenny's disappearance, but what about after? What if you can't find her? I didn't have to tell Jack about Haley, Aaron did, but I know that I'd have to tell Henry because Will-"

Emily winces, "Stop talking Catherine."

My teeth click as I close my mouth.

Emily wraps her arms around me; "You're not going to have to tell Henry about Jennifer's disappearance because the team and I are going to find her. I promise."

I flinch, "Don't make promises you can't keep."

Emily sighs, "I don't. I missed you Creirwy."

"I missed you too Emmy," I mumble into her shoulder with a yawn.

"Light the candle Creirwy," Emily murmurs and presses my lighter into my hand.

I slip behind the couch, raise an eyebrow at Emily, and sit down next to my sleeping nephew.

Emily's smiling face appears at the edge of the couch, "You do know that there is not enough space back there for the three of us, right?"

I sigh and climb over the back of the couch.

"Budge up Creirwy," Emily murmurs and settles down next to me.

I light the tea light sitting on the coffee table and tuck my lighter back into my pocket. _Please Jessie_ are the only words I can manage even in my own head.

Emily sets her phone on the table before wrapping her arms around me tightly. She lifts me slightly and I end up on her lap.

Yawning, I curl into her and rest my head on her shoulder.

"Everything is going to be all right Creirwy," she murmurs into my hair. "We will not be too late to save our Jennifer and even if we are, I promise you that you will not have to raise Henry alone."

I shiver, "It's been over seventeen hours since Will called me. She must be so scared, I know I was and am. Please bring her back Emmy. I need her to be alive." I yawn again, "I don't know why I'm so tired all of a sudden."

Emily kisses the crown of my head, "How long has it been since you slept?"

I shrug, "I slept on the couch with Spence for an hour or two and then I got another few minutes before Henry woke me up."

She sighs, "And before that, how long had it been since you'd slept? How munch sleep did you get?"

I shift uncomfortably on her lap.

Emily loosens her grip.

I lie down on the couch, my head in her lap. "The team was away on a case for a few days," I wrinkle my nose and do a quick mental calculation, "Maybe a baker's dozen of hours in the past four days if I include last night." I yawn widely.

Emily sighs, "Go to sleep Creirwy, I'll hold you."

I sigh and close my eyes.

Emily tucks a blanket in around me and she doesn't move my head from her lap, even when her phone vibrates from its spot on the table.

* * *

**Emily's POV**

6:15 pm

I take a minute to bask in the calm of JJ's old office. Catherine is thankfully asleep and I'm pretty sure that quiet gasp I just heard was Henry waking up. I call out to him, "Henry, honey, come out from back there. I've missed you and I want to see how much you've grown."

A few seconds of scrabbling and then a blonde head pops out from behind the couch. "Auntie Emily!" He greets me with a huge grin.

I put a hand on his shoulder to stop him from jumping on to the couch. "Hello little man," I smile back at him, "Wow, you've gotten so big! Are you taller than Jack now?"

He giggles, "Auntie Emily you're silly!"

"Come give me a hug," I hold out an arm to him, "Just be careful of Catherine, she's sleeping."

Henry nods and hops up onto the arm of the couch and wraps his arms around my neck.

"I missed you Henry," I mumble into his hair.

He kisses my cheek, "Missed you, but I'm hungry! Can we wake up Kit Cat now?"

I take a second to check the time on my watch. "Henry, Catherine took some medicine to help her sleep, so she's not going to wake up for a few hours yet," I brush his hair away from his eyes.

"Okay," Henry frowns at me, "But I still get dinner?"

"Yes sweetheart," I smile at him, "Your dinner is on the table in front of us."

Henry looks at the clear plastic containers stacked on the coffee table and wrinkles his nose, "That's not grilled cheese!"

I hold back an involuntary snicker; Spencer warned me that Henry was going through a picky phase. "No it's not," I agree with him, "Because the grilled cheese would be soggy by the time you ate it. And soggy food tastes icky!"

Henry giggles.

"We do have ham and cheese sandwiches and chicken and lettuce," I say and wait for the impending reaction and am not disappointed.

Henry frowns and crosses his arms, "I don't eat lettuce, it's green!"

I sigh and try not to laugh, Henry looks like a tiny angry JJ. "Ham and cheese it is. You can pretend it is grilled cheese," I tell him as I open the Tupperware.

Henry frowns at me but takes the offered sandwich, hops down off the couch, and reaches for Catherine's water bottle.

I grab the back of his shirt, "No Henry, don't drink from that one!"

He frowns at me, "Why not? I don't know where mine is and I drank out of Kit Cat's bottle before."

I wince internally before answering, "Catherine's medicine is in that bottle. It's not for kids Henry."

"Okay," Henry shrugs and shoves a quarter sandwich in his mouth.

* * *

7:47 pm

I watch as Dave and Blake search JJ's office again while conversing quietly in Italian. I wonder how long it will take the State Department to realize that the team has not backed down. It's not like they've been very subtle, then again, with the exception of my supposed death, they've never really needed to do something like this before. They've never worked undercover, never had to give up being who they are so that they could become someone else.

"What are grandpa and Alex doing Auntie Em?" Henry asks from his position on my lap.

I sigh, "They're working Henry," and hug him just a little bit tighter.

He squirms and looks over at Catherine who is currently curled up in a ball on the other side of the couch. "Is Kit Cat having nightmares?" He asks out of the blue.

Dave and Blake look over at us and I shake my head at them.

"Because we should wake her up if she is," Henry continues.

I recognize the way Catherine is curled up and I cringe, "She won't wake up Henry, Catherine took her medicine remember? But she's okay."

His big blue eyes look up at me, "Are you sure?"

I lie to him, "Yes."

He sighs and snuggles into me.

My phone dings; I glance at the text and frown, "Dave!"

He looks up at me, nods, and says, "Time to move Blake."

Dave and Blake are out of the office in thirty seconds after the two of them fold what I can only assume to be relevant documents up and shove them into jacket pockets.

As soon as the door is closed I say, "Henry, honey, I need you to go behind the couch and stay there until I tell you to come out."

"Why?" He asks with a frown.

"Now please, Henry!" I say with more than a little urgency.

He grumbles a bit but climbs off my lap and disappears behind the couch.

I hear the sound of several sets of sensible shoes tromping along down the hall towards us. I gather Catherine up and rearrange her sleeping form against me. Then I grab a book, open it and pretend to read.

Henry lets out a startled gasp as the door bursts open and I frown at the four agents from the State Department entering the office.

* * *

AN2: Thank you for reading, please review :)


	5. Part 5

AN: Thanks for reading and reviewing :) If you have suggestions/requests for what you would like to see in the next chapter to two please let me know. I haven't finished writing it so there may be a way to add in what you'd like to read.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau is mine along with any other characters you don't recognize.

* * *

**PART 5**

* * *

And I swear that I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

No I don't have a gun

Memoria, memoria

* * *

**Emily's POV**

7:59 pm

_Thank goodness Creirwy is asleep_ is the first thought that crosses my mind_._ I close the book I've not been reading and place it on the coffee table. "That was rather rude, you could have knocked." I chastise the four men who have entered Catherine's sanctuary uninvited.

"You are being ordered to vacate these premises," The dark haired man in front informs me.

I raise an eyebrow, "Do you know to whom you are speaking?"

He frowns, "_Former_ Supervisory Special Agent Emily Prentiss." It's impossible to miss the emphasis on former.

My smile is as cold as ice, "Ah good, so then you do know my name."

The unnamed Agent's hand twitches but he continues to frown, "You are being ordered to vacate these premises."

I frown at him, "You haven't introduced yourself, nor have you addressed me correctly. You also have not defined what you mean by 'these premises'. Do you mean this office in particular, or the building, or could you perhaps mean Quantico in its entirety?"

"Former-," he says.

I narrow my eyes and cut him off, "It is Director Prentiss. I run the London office of Interpol."

His jaw drops a little bit.

I smirk, "Someone obviously neglected to inform you of that little tidbit."

He shifts his weight from one foot to the other. "Director Prentiss I am Agent Craig Hicks from the State Department and I have been ordered to remove you from these premises and detain you along with Miss Jareau and Mister LaMontagne."

"You still haven't defined the term premises and now you're going to detain us? On what grounds and on whose authority?" I frown before asking curiously "Are you going to be providing protection for the three of them?"

"T-three?" he stutters, "We're only here for you, the girl and the boy." He looks around the office, "Where is the boy?"

I raise my eyebrow again, "Oh, so you're not going to be looking for Detective William LaMontagne jr?"

He shakes his head, "No. Now I see the girl, where's the boy?"

I roll my eyes and ignore his question, "The _girl _and the _boy_ as you have so aptly named them, are in protective custody Agent Hicks. Will you and your," I pause and run my eyes calculatingly over the other three agents, "Friends, be providing that necessity?" _I know that I couldn't take all four of them in a fight at once, but I am infinitely better at political word games than this pillock._

Agent Hicks shakes his head, "I don't believe that will be necessary Director Prentiss."

I purse my lips, "Oh you don't do you? Well then, please forgive me if I do not believe your oh so compelling and sincere assurances on the safety of my extended family while their mother and sister is missing."

His brow wrinkles in confusion.

_I suppose I should be grateful they didn't send someone who could go toe to toe with me, but honestly, shouldn't State have sent someone who was at least semi-familiar with myself, JJ or the case and not some lackey? Could it really have slipped their minds that I would come back with my family in danger? I did it two and a half years ago. Then again, maybe one of the higher-ups doesn't like this guy. _I continue magnanimously, "I will accompany you but I remind you that you have no grounds to detain me. I am merely here to offer support and protect-"

He cuts me off, "Director Prentiss."

"Do not interrupt me again Agent Hicks," I say while mimicking Hotch's glare and am pleased when he takes a step back. "Now as you still haven't defined 'these premises' will you please do so now?"

It's not a question but an order and he responds accordingly, "I mean this office Director Prentiss."

I nod, "Alright, and where exactly would you like the three of us to relocate to?"

He shifts his weight from one foot to the other and back.

"Out with it," I command, more than a little annoyed.

He sighs, "The rest of your former team has been detained in the conference room."

"Which one?" I ask politely.

"Um," he mumbles.

I sigh in exasperation.

"The one attached to the bullpen," he says finally.

I nod, "Very well. Will you and your _friends_ be carrying our luggage?"

One of the men behind Agent Hicks turns his head, which fails to hide the grin on his face.

Agent Hicks looks at me in confusion.

I roll my eyes, "Two of the people you will be accompanying to the roundtable room have been here for eighteen and twenty hours respectively. And while I have only been here for a few hours I flew here directly from the London office of Interpol. Surely you didn't think we would not have brought personal items?"

Silence.

I frown, "Well if you're not going to carry our bags I will need you to fetch someone who will."

Finally he says something, "The other BAU agents who have been detained are not allowed out of the conference room."

"Really?" I ask, "And what about when someone needs to use the loo?"

A snort comes from the same guy who smiled earlier.

Hicks flushes, "We'll deal with that when the time comes."

I roll my eyes.

He continues more respectfully, "I cannot in good conscience allow someone else from the BAU team to come here. I still need to know where the boy is."

I want to crush him under the heel of my boot even more. "He is here," I answer coolly.

The four men look around the room in confusion.

"Where?" Hicks demands.

I raise an eyebrow at his disrespect and speak calmly, "Henry, come to me please."

Henry walks around the back of the couch and stops next to the arm of the couch.

I savor the looks of surprise on the Agent Hicks and the others. I rest my free hand on Henry's shoulder, "These _nice_ men-"

Henry's eyes widen and he interrupts me, "Nice like when Alex uses it?"

Jennifer told me that story and so I grin at her son, "Yes Henry, nice just like the way Alex uses it." I wave my hand negligently at the four men who are staring at us in confusion, "They are going to take a walk with us. We're going to the roundtable room. Please pack your backpack Henry and then you can give it to the man with red hair and a blue tie."

Henry nods and does as bid.

We sit and stand respectively in tense silence as Henry packs. When he's finished he hands his dinosaur backpack to the right State Department Agent and comes to stand in front of me again.

I smile at him, "Good. Now I want you to sit with Catherine on the couch while I pack her bag."

"Yes Aunt Emily," he replies in his most grownup tone of voice and promptly ruins the image by hopping up onto the couch.

I move Catherine from her resting spot on my shoulder to lean against the couch and stand up. Then I toss Creirwy's book and her files into her bag as quickly as possible, entirely certain that Hicks is going to try something.

Sure enough, Agent Hicks and a second Agent approach the couch.

"Back up! Do not touch either of them," I spit out harshly.

The second Agent frowns but complies and moves back to the doorway.

Agent Hicks takes two more steps and watches me closely.

In two seconds flat I'm across the room and standing toe to toe with an annoying little pissant. I growl, "What part of back up and don't touch did you not understand?"

He straightens, "Why hasn't she woken up? Why haven't you woken her up? She needs to wake up to walk!"

I raise an eyebrow, "Why the soon to be Dr. Jareau has not woken up is none of your business. As for your other question," I keep my emotions off my face as I half lie, "If I wanted her to walk I would have woken her up."

"I'm certainly not going to carry her!" he bellows, "Neither will anyone from my team!"

I smile venomously, "Good, because if you didn't catch my drift earlier. I don't want you touching either of the blondes in this room. Nor will you Agent Hicks," I add as a clear warning.

"Understood," he says meekly and steps back.

I smile at the nervous Henry, "Come along leibling it's time to go see the rest of your family."

Henry slides down off the couch.

I gather the still sleeping Catherine up into my arms, very thankful for unnoticed sleeping pills. With Henry by my side we cross the office, parting the sea of agents to either side. I let a smirk cross my face as I pause in the doorway and call back, "Agent Hicks, would you be so kind as to grab both mine and Miss Jareau's bag? I appear to have my hands full at the moment."

"That was awesome Auntie Emily," Henry grins up at me.

"Thank you Henry," I reply as we walk down the hall to the glass doors of the bullpen with the four State Department Agents trailing after us.

* * *

**Catherine's POV**

9:45 pm

"Wake up please Creirwy," Emily whispers in my ear.

I open my eyes and blink a few times to ensure the information they are providing me with is correct. From my position curled up on Emily's lap I can see Aaron, Dave and Blake. They are conversing quietly in the corner closest to the window with the blinds drawn. While Derek is watching over Penelope's shoulder as she and Kevin do something at the laptop station set up on the table. I mumble my confusion aloud, "How did we end up here?"

Emily laughs at my bewilderment then sighs, "We were summarily kicked out of the office you and Henry were squatting in."

I frown, "Why and by whom?" My brain kicks in; I can't see Spencer or Henry. I lift my head from Emily's shoulder and sit up properly, "Where's Henry? Where's Spence?"

"Relax," Emily whispers and rubs my back, "Henry is sitting in the corner over there, Spencer is reading to him."

I nod and shiver.

Emily removes her hand. "To answer your other question, it was Agents from the State Department." She sighs, "They were, and still are, acting ridiculously." She wraps her arms loosely around my waist and glares venomously first at the door and then at the closed blinds blocking the view of the bullpen. "But don't worry, I didn't let them touch you or Henry while I verbally slapped around their leader."

"I slept through that?" I ask incredulously, "How? I certainly don't remember walking here. Who carried me? Why are we in the roundtable room? Emmy you're all going to get into more trouble, I'm not supposed to be in here. I mean I was before but that was because Aaron wanted to talk to me. I-"

Emily puts a finger to my lips.

I stop talking and frown at her.

She sighs, "Do you remember the water bottle I gave you?"

I narrow my eyes in suspicion, "Yes."

Emily looks sheepishly at me, "We knew you hadn't been sleeping so we dissolved a full dose of your sleeping pills in it."

_They drugged me! _I slip off her lap and stand up. I glower at Emily and my voice raises in disbelief and no small amount of anger, "You did what?"

Emily winces at the volume, "We just wanted you to sleep for a while so that you would be in better shape when you woke up." She sighs, "We were kind of also hoping to find Jennifer before you woke up." Emily grabs my hand, "It was for the best Creirwy, you've slept for a few hours now and can you imagine how upset you would have been if you had been awake or woken up when the agents from the State Department came to evict us even if I was verbally stomping on their leader?"

I nod tersely at Emily and turn my glare on Spencer.

He looks worried and holds Henry up in front of him as a shield.

My anger deflates at the confused expression on my nephew's face. I cross the room and lift Henry from Spencer's lap.

"Why were you yelling Kit Cat?" he whispers in my ear.

I smile tightly, "Auntie Emily and uncle Spencer did something naughty." I level a glare around the rest of the room, "I'm quite sure the rest of our family helped."

Henry's eyes widen and he looks back and forth between the two chastened agents, then at the rest of our family, "Are you going to put all of them in time out? Grandpa too?"

Dave barks out a laugh.

I turn my head to look coldly at him.

He stops laughing abruptly.

"Emily!" Penelope calls out, interrupting the hold I have on the room.

Emily's head whips around to look at her friend, "What is it?"

"Kevin and I," She looks meaningfully at her, "We're ready."

Emily looks back at me, "Catherine I need you to listen to me."

Anger and betrayal are clouding my judgment. "What is it Emily?" I snap.

She shakes her head, "Put Henry down and come over here."

I sigh; give my nephew back to Spencer and cross the room. "Yes?" I whisper, staring at her shoulder.

Emily tips my head back and locks her eyes on mine, "We have a lead Catherine. We need to leave now. The State Department Agents are only guarding the door to the bullpen so we're going out the back but Penelope and Kevin are staying to help from here. I need you to take care of Henry and be brave when the Agents burst in-"

I interrupt her, "Emily-"

She cuts me off, "Because they're going to, as soon as the figure out what we've done." Emily hugs me, "I'll bring her back Creirwy, I promised didn't I?"

I hug her back just as tightly and nod solemnly. "I'm still angry," I inform her, "But we can talk later."

Emily takes a step back and pulls on the bulletproof vest Derek hands her.

I looks around the room and watch as everyone but Spencer pulls on an identical vest and checks their guns.

Henry is still wrapped up in Spencer's arms peppering him with a bunch of questions too quickly for Spencer to actually answer them, not that he's making any attempt to.

I cross the room and take Henry back into the supposed safety of my arms.

Spencer nods sadly at me and pulls on his own vest.

I settle Henry on my hip and we stand by the exit, "We're going to wait here for a bit Henry so that we don't get in the way."

Henry's voice is muffled by my shoulder, "Where are they going Kit Cat?"

I sigh, "They're going to do some more work so that we can all go home."

"Okay," he mumbles through a yawn.

I kiss Henry's forehead, "Sleep leibling."

Aaron is the first to reach us: He ruffles Henry's hair, squeezes the hand closest to him, and walks out of the room.

Dave and Alex are next; Dave pats Henry's back and whispers, "Essere coraggiosi," (be brave). Alex just smiles tightly at me and they exit through the open door.

"Princess I-" Derek sighs then straightens his back, "Now don't kick anyone in the shins alright?" He smirks, "You have more power in your legs and better aim." He sighs again, "Though if one of the idiots on the other side of the door happens to touch you try not to freak out okay? Stay calm and think about Henry, he needs you to be rational. Don't you little man?" Derek says to my nephew.

Henry blinks at him sleepily.

I roll my eyes and nod.

Derek smiles sadly at the little boy in my arms, "You're going to be a great mom Princess, but we won't make you Henry's tonight."

Emily takes Henry from my arms and Derek hugs me tightly before wiping his eyes and taking off.

Emily who has been whispering in Henry's ear sets him down on the floor and receives a hug.

My nephew doesn't ask to be picked up again; instead he wraps his arms around my leg and rests his head on my hip.

I rest one hand on his head in acknowledgement and wrap my free arm around Emily.

"We need to move quickly," she whispers in my ear, "But we've made sure you'll still have a minute to say good-bye to Spencer."

I kiss her cheek, "Thank you."

Emily kisses the top of my head and follows Derek.

First Spencer tucks Peter Rabbit in between Henry's arms and my leg then he stands up and wraps his arms around my waist.

I stand on my tiptoes, "Be safe, but bring her back to me Spence."

"Always," he whispers and leans down to kiss me.

* * *

10:30 pm

"Cupcake," Penelope calls out softly.

I look up from my study of Henry's sleeping face, "Yes?" I've been trying to pick out all the little things that make him resemble Jenny. I've come to the conclusion that he's got her eyes, nose, and chin but Will's lips and ears.

Penelope spares a brief glance for Kevin who is staring at the door apprehensively. She sighs, "What Kevin and I are about to do is going to cause the shit to hit the fan. So there is every chance the minions on the other side of that door are going to be bursting in here in a few minutes. I want you to know we're sorry but this is necessary since we all want to get Jay-J back."

I nod.

"Are you ready?" Penelope asks worriedly.

I smile weakly at her, "No, but do it anyway."

Penelope presses the button on her Bluetooth, "Ready when you are boss man."

I wrap Henry just a little tighter in his blanket and slip the strap of my bag over my free shoulder, no need to lose it.

"Got it!" Penelope exclaims excitedly just as four State Department lackeys burst into the office.

A single agent drags Kevin out first while another grabs Penelope who is yelling out a pair of street names in Pig Latin.

When the final two approach me I panic momentarily and my bag slips off my shoulder. I'm already out of my chair and backing myself into a corner stumbling over my words before I manage to somewhat restrain my terror and say clearly, "Don't touch me!"

Henry mumbles in his sleep and I tear my eyes away from the two extremely scary men in front of me to check on my nephew for a split second. I sigh in relief, he's still asleep.

The red headed agent with the blue tie puts a restraining hand on what is presumably his boss' arm. In a low voice he says, "Director Prentiss warned us not to touch her earlier Hicks. There was obviously a valid reason for that particular directive."

The newly named Hicks growls, "I don't care what _Former_ Agent Prentiss said Milne. This girl is coming with us and so is the boy. Now I'm ordering you to take the boy from her!"

My breathing speeds up. _They can't take Henry! I need him!_

Milne shakes his head, "You're terrifying her and we don't want the kid to panic if he wakes up. Have some compassion Hicks."

Hicks growls, "I order-"

Milne frowns, "No! You're not my boss, nor are you my superior. I have my own team. I only agreed to follow your lead as necessary, and scaring unarmed, defenseless women and children in no way falls under those parameters. We know she's not an agent Hicks; she's barely more than a kid. Now back the hell away from her."

Hicks snarls, but backs up.

The red head turns to me and holding his hands out palms up says, "Dr. Jareau, we need you to come with us, please."

His addressing me as Dr. Jareau confuses me. I shake my head and stumble over my words, "I can't. Please! I'm sorry, but I can't! I- Henry-" Breathing is becoming increasingly more difficult.

He sighs, "Can we call someone in from the bullpen to get you to leave with us?"

"Where are you taking us?" I whisper fearfully.

Milne sighs, "To an undisclosed location off base."

"Why so loud Kit Cat?" Henry mumbles sleepily as he wraps his arms around my neck and legs around my waist.

"Shh! Henry, it's okay," I murmur and change the way my arms are wrapped around his fragile body. "Everything is going to be okay. Go back to sleep," I whisper but I'm not fooling anyone, least of all myself.

"Dr. Jareau?" Milne repeats the confounded title.

I frown nervously at him, "Penelope Garcia."

Hicks growls, "No way! Move your ass already or I will make you!" He unclips and draws his gun, keeping it pointed at the floor as he advances on me.

Henry screams when he sees the gun.

I hold him tightly to my chest; half turn and lash out with my foot.

It connects with Hicks' knee and a sickening crunch rips through the silence of the roundtable room. Hicks' gun clatters on the floor as he crumples.

Henry is crying and trembling in my arms.

"I want Jenny," Escapes my lips before I realize what I've said and done. I blanch, slide down the wall to the floor and start gagging.

"Arrest her!" Hicks shouts from his position on the ground.

"It's your own fault," Milne informs him and holds out the garbage can to me.

I take it, set it down next to me, and proceed to empty my stomach of what is left of my lunch.

Henry meanwhile is still crying and attached to me like a limpet.

Agent Hicks howls in a mixture of pain and rage, "She assaulted a federal agent! This is going in my report! I want to press charges, arrest her!"  
Milne rolls his eyes, "You want to know what's going in my report Hicks? You, drawing your gun on an unarmed woman holding a child! I'm not going to arrest her so give it up already!" Milne crosses the room, sticks his head out the door and says something I can't hear.

A minute later Penelope enters the office trailed by her guard dog. "Oh Cupcake," she sighs sadly as she takes in the scene.

"Miss Garcia," Milne addresses her, "You're still being detained but I need you to walk Dr. Jareau out of this room and-"

Penelope cuts him off, "Later minion, I need to make sure my Cupcake is able to stand first."

Milne raises an eyebrow at the nickname but doesn't say anything else as Penelope whirls over to me and alights on the closest chair.

Eventually she whispers, "Cupcake are you going to let me hold Henry?"

I shake my head.

Penelope sighs, "Henry do you want to come sit with me?"

Henry shakes his head before turning his big blue eyes on Penelope but addresses me, "Kit Cat I want my mommy."

I lean over the garbage can again.

"Your mommy's busy right now Henry," Penelope answers him, "But you have Catherine here to take care of you, and me, and Kevin too." She opens her purse and pulls out a package of wet wipes, "Wash your face little prince."

Henry mumbles a thank you and wipes his face. "Love you Kit Cat," he whispers and kisses my cheek.

I rest my head on his, "Love you too leibling."

"What happened to make you sick Cupcake?" Penelope asks curiously.

I refuse to meet her eyes, "I said I wanted you and he," I nod in Hicks' direction "Said no and unclipped his gun and drew it. Henry screamed and I- I just reacted. I kicked him just like Derek showed me to and then," I take a few seconds to calm my breathing, "And then I said I want Jenny." I wipe my eyes before more tears can fall.

"Cupcake," Penelope murmurs and slides down to sit next to me. Choosing to ignore almost everything I've said she responds with, "We all want JJ to come back," and wraps her arm around me.

I rest my head on her shoulder.

Henry yawns and hides his face in the crook of my neck.

"Go back to sleep leibling," I murmur, "I'll keep you safe."

Henry mumbles something incoherently and sighs.

"You, minion," Penelope says and points at Milne, "She needs water and you'll probably want to have either Kevin Lynch come back in here or call Detective LaMontagne. Cupcake is Henry's guardian when his parents are not around and I doubt she'll be handing him over anytime soon."

Milne speaks quietly with one of the two unnamed agents. One pulls out his phone, the other returns a moment later with Kevin.

"Come here Kevin," Penelope directs his attention away from Hicks who is now sitting up and glaring at me while he clutches at his knee.

Kevin stops just out of reach and squats down. "Hi Catherine," he greets me quietly, "Shall I hold Henry for you so that you can stand up?"

I shake my head and hide my face in Henry's hair.

Kevin says her name as if it were an entire series of questions, "Penelope?"

"My Cupcake needs water Kevin," She states and then whispers, "I need you to find a way to contact-"

Milne takes a few steps, coming closer to the four of us.

Penelope glares at the red head, "Hold that thought."

"I have water," Milne announces and holds out the mug to Penelope. She sniffs it and takes a sip before passing it to me.

My lips twitch slightly as I recognize the mug as the one Jack decorated for Aaron last Father's day. I rinse my mouth several times before downing the remaining water.

"Ready?" Penelope asks gently.

I shrug.

"Are you sure you don't need me to hold Henry while you get up?" Kevin asks nervously.

I nod and swing my legs around to get enough momentum to stand.

"Well that worked well," Kevin murmurs in amusement.

"Come on Cupcake, it's time to follow the minions," Penelope says and positions herself and Kevin on opposite sides of me.

"Where are we going?" I ask again but silence is my only answer.

* * *

AN2: Thanks for reading, please review :) I tried to write Catherine being brave when she met the SD Agents, unconsciously emulating Emily but it didn't work out.


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